"Funky Winkerbean" Is Fucking Stupid.

Graphic novels. Weekly rags. The @$$holes.

"Funky Winkerbean" Is Fucking Stupid.

Postby buster00 on Thu Nov 09, 2006 6:34 am

I can't take it anymore. I think we can all agree that the comic strip "Funky Winkerbean" is just absolutely fucking stupid. It used to be kinda OK, but now? It's just fucking stupid. Why does Tom Batiuk even have a drawing table at this point?

What other daily comic strips are throwing good ink after bad? Which features make the funnies...well, not?
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Postby doglips on Thu Nov 09, 2006 6:45 am

Image

Ugh, see what you mean. I'm not familiar with the strip, Buster, did it used to be more on the ball than this?
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Postby buster00 on Thu Nov 09, 2006 8:49 am

thedoglippedone wrote:Image

Ugh, see what you mean. I'm not familiar with the strip, Buster, did it used to be more on the ball than this?


Eh, "on the ball" isn't really the term I would use, but it used to be a simple little gag strip about a bunch o' teenagers.

Then, suddenly, the main characters all got aged into thirty-year-olds (with teenage relatives or whatever), and the whole thing took on a serialized format with a preachy overtone. Maximum Shark Jumpage.



And when is "Marmaduke" gonna get hit by a bus already? There's another strip whose longevity baffles me.
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Postby Ribbons on Thu Nov 09, 2006 9:45 am

:x Hey!

If you're gonna insult my favorite comic strip with profanities, then you'd better put it up in the EFBR!

It's fisticuffs then! [rolls up cyber-sleeves]...
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Postby buster00 on Thu Nov 09, 2006 4:15 pm

Ribbons wrote::x Hey!

If you're gonna insult my favorite comic strip with profanities, then you'd better put it up in the EFBR!

It's fisticuffs then! [rolls up cyber-sleeves]...


Which one? Funky or Marmaduke?


And this thread wasn't meant to be Winkerbean exclusive. I kind of intended it as a litter box for any comic strips that you're sick of seeing in the paper.
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Postby Ribbons on Thu Nov 09, 2006 4:53 pm

It's cool. I don't think I've ever read "Funky Winkerbean," actually. I clicked your link and it does indeed seem pretty pukatronic.

Since this is an all-inclusive thread, I submit for your approval: the worst strip evar...?
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Postby Tyrone_Shoelaces on Thu Nov 09, 2006 6:57 pm

I remember reading "Funky Winkerbean" as a kid. "Band nerds, funny." Then I looked at it again a couple years ago. What the fuck happened? What a bunch of morose motherfuckers.

I'll defend "The Lockhorns" because I've been reading them since I figured out the funnies are the best part of the paper and every once in a while they get a good one in. You'd think they would just get divorced already.

My pick for Worst. Comic. Strip. Ever. is "The Family Circus." I'll say it. That thing will totally ruin a comic reading experience. You'll be on a roll, getting a good rhythm with the laughter, "Oh, Beetle got pummeled again. Ha, Dagwood ate another big sandwich. Poor Charlie Brown. Dead Grandpa followed Billy around the neighborhood. DAMMIT!" You then have to struggle to get back into that groove, hoping that "Calvin and Hobbes" reprint will end it all with a big belly laugh. If it isn't some dead relative hiding in the closet its some treacly "cute" kid moment that is neither cute, nor - most importantly - funny. Die, Billy, die.
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Postby buster00 on Thu Nov 09, 2006 7:01 pm

Tyrone_Shoelaces wrote:
My pick for Worst. Comic. Strip. Ever. is "The Family Circus." I'll say it. That thing will totally ruin a comic reading experience. You'll be on a roll, getting a good rhythm with the laughter, "Oh, Beetle got pummeled again. Ha, Dagwood ate another big sandwich. Poor Charlie Brown. Dead Grandpa followed Billy around the neighborhood. DAMMIT!"


HAHAHAHAHA!! Beautifully stated!

"Family Circus" is right up there with "Love Is" on the "enough-saccharine-to-give-you-cancer" scale.
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Postby Fievel on Tue Nov 14, 2006 4:05 am

I'll add For Better Or Worse to the list. I hate serialized strips where the characters grow older and experiance problems (see Funky Winkerbean). Make me laugh, make me think, or just stop altogether.

The Funky Winkerbean spin-off of Crankshaft pulled a similar shark jump. What was once a strip about a crabby old bus driver became a soapbox for Alzheimer's disease, lonliness in the elderly, etc.
Thanks for making me feel so horrible to be alive while I eat my Cocoa Pebbles.
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Postby DennisMM on Wed Nov 15, 2006 3:56 pm

I like "Funky" when it focuses on the adults, though it can be morose and preachy. The teenage stuff just doesn't work for me anymore. Batiuk said it all before the ten-year jump he did.

Worst strips ever, right from the start: "Marmaduke" and "Garfield." Those that wore out their welcome many years ago: "Dennis the Menace" and "The Family Circus." There are only so many variations on the gags these strips use. "Cathy" is trying to renew itself with the title character being married, but what I've seen is no better than it was before the nuptials.

There are some short-lived strips no one remembers that may have been the worst of all, such as "Committed," which focused on a young professional couple. After a couple of years the writer/artist said he'd enjoyed doing the strip but was retiring it. In other words, it wasn't in many papers and he wasn't making money. It also bit the big one because the "artist" couldn't draw, a problem with too many comic strips today.

Let's not forget "Drabble" or the homespun cheeriness and nine repetitive jokes that comprise "Rose is Rose."
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Postby The Vicar on Wed Nov 15, 2006 4:41 pm

Rex Morgan, MD & Judge Parker.

Unbridled wankfest !!
Everybody talks in exclaimation points...every damned sentence!!!!

Too much caffeine ( or meth ) I suppose !!

Lamest comics evar!!!
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Postby DennisMM on Wed Nov 15, 2006 4:44 pm

"This is a very rare 'Mary Worth' comic strip in which she advises a friend to commit suicide."
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Postby unikrunk on Wed Nov 15, 2006 5:16 pm

DennisMM wrote:"This is a very rare 'Mary Worth' comic strip in which she advises a friend to commit suicide."


Yep, but I found this one way more telling of her and the late Aldo's 'encounters'.

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He can't' love you back...
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Postby The Vicar on Wed Nov 15, 2006 5:31 pm

Perfect, Unikrunk... :) :) :)

If Mary Worth was actually written that way, I'd check it out.

She needs to join us in THIS century.
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Postby Fievel on Wed Nov 15, 2006 5:47 pm

I think Mary Worth needs to morph into a 60-something ex-hippie that just sits around, smokes pot, and gives off advice that rarely makes sense, but somehow always works.

Chris: "Look what I can do to Mary Worth's smug sense of self-satisfaction."
Peter: "That's right son, take her down a peg."
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Postby Ribbons on Wed Nov 15, 2006 5:48 pm

Give her a mercenary grandson who's always in trouble with his employers and then we're really talking...
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Postby unikrunk on Wed Nov 15, 2006 5:54 pm

Ribbons wrote:Give her a mercenary grandson who's always in trouble with his employers and then we're really talking...


Holy shit Ribbons, you just triggered inspirado!

Mary Worth's grandson is, get this, Reid Fleming; World's Toughest Milkman:

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Postby Tyrone_Shoelaces on Thu Nov 16, 2006 11:37 pm

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From the archives of "Medium Large" by Francesco Marciuliano
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Postby Adam Balm on Thu Nov 16, 2006 11:49 pm

Tyrone_Shoelaces wrote:My pick for Worst. Comic. Strip. Ever. is "The Family Circus." I'll say it.


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Postby buster00 on Sat Nov 18, 2006 7:32 pm

Here's something for you to try: When reading the soap opera strips (like "Mary Worth," "Rex Morgan M.D." or "Apartment 3-G"), do so under the presumption that they are supposed to be post-modern gag strips with a punchline in the last panel. You'll be amazed to find that they are the funniest comics in the paper every time!
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re: Marmaduke

Postby Dollar Bird on Sun Nov 19, 2006 1:52 am

Anyone who has the ability to read should investigate:
http://marmadukeexplained.blogspot.com/
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Postby Lady Sheridan on Sun Nov 19, 2006 2:48 am

Marmaduke's civil rights activism was thwarted by what appears to be either a police officer or a yacht captain.


Image

Stick it to the man, Marmaduke!
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Postby The Garbage Man on Sun Nov 19, 2006 4:17 am

DennisMM wrote:Worst strips ever, right from the start: "Marmaduke" and "Garfield."


Hey, Garfield's still got it:

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Postby Adam Balm on Sun Nov 19, 2006 4:37 am

I dunno, I'm more of a Detective Horse fan...

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Postby RaulMonkey on Sun Nov 19, 2006 4:50 am

buster00 wrote:
thedoglippedone wrote:Image

Ugh, see what you mean. I'm not familiar with the strip, Buster, did it used to be more on the ball than this?


Eh, "on the ball" isn't really the term I would use, but it used to be a simple little gag strip about a bunch o' teenagers.

Then, suddenly, the main characters all got aged into thirty-year-olds (with teenage relatives or whatever), and the whole thing took on a serialized format with a preachy overtone. Maximum Shark Jumpage.


It was totally surreal when characters started going to Afghanistan.
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Postby buster00 on Mon Nov 20, 2006 1:57 am

Adam Balm wrote:I dunno, I'm more of a Detective Horse fan...


I thought Detective Horse crashed and burned after the ill-advised live-action movie.

Image


They can't all be Dick Tracy, huh?
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Postby Tyrone_Shoelaces on Mon Nov 20, 2006 11:53 pm

But did you see the Brenda Starr movie?
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Postby buster00 on Wed Nov 22, 2006 4:40 pm

Tyrone_Shoelaces wrote:But did you see the Brenda Starr movie?



BRRRRrrrrrr....I've never been able to summon the courage to sit through the whole thing. If you did, you're a better man than I am, Tyrone_Shoelaces.
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Postby RaulMonkey on Sat Feb 03, 2007 1:10 am

Image

Ahahahahahahaahahahahahahaahhahaa!

Good one!

I think maybe they should move FB to some random place in the classifieds like they did with REX MORGAN M.D. (in the Calgary Herald anyway.) Keep the "serial," not-funny comics off the funny pages.
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Postby LaDracul on Sat Feb 03, 2007 1:14 am

To go with the WHY?! factor, I'm wondering why Bill Amend has decided to make "FoxTrot" a weekly strip. I'm deeply disturbed by its replacement, "Lio", which should belong in the Reader or some other alternative newspaper. I think it was a bad move on his part.

But, I had to get used to it when "Bloom County" ended and "Opus" became weekly.
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Postby Lady Sheridan on Sat Feb 03, 2007 2:47 am

I am so sad that I didn't come up with a snarky Sunday comic blog before Marmaduke and this guy did:

http://joshreads.com/
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Postby RadioDan on Fri Mar 09, 2007 2:20 pm

Funky's on amusing moment was when he was a float in a parade on the Simpsons.

Image

Hey Funky! Over here!
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Postby Fievel on Fri Mar 09, 2007 2:52 pm

LaDracul wrote:But, I had to get used to it when "Bloom County" ended and "Opus" became weekly.


Bloom County became Outland, which sucked horrible.
Opus is a beautiful and brilliant return/update to Bloom County form.
It's my first "must read" every Sunday.
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Postby havocSchultz on Fri Mar 09, 2007 2:54 pm

RadioDan wrote:Funky's on amusing moment was when he was a float in a parade on the Simpsons.

Image




That looks nothing like Funky...
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Postby Lord Voldemoo on Fri Mar 09, 2007 3:03 pm

Fievel wrote:
LaDracul wrote:But, I had to get used to it when "Bloom County" ended and "Opus" became weekly.


Bloom County became Outland, which sucked horrible.
Opus is a beautiful and brilliant return/update to Bloom County form.
It's my first "must read" every Sunday.


Me too, I loved Bloom County and I love Opus, I'm so happy that it was a return to form for Brethed after Outland.

I hate to admit this, really, but I like Garfield. :oops: :oops: :oops:

It's like a security blanket, I always know exactly what to expect in advance...

I want to find Cathy and lock her in Kirks' dungeon with Gaffney.
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Postby DinoDeLaurentiis on Fri Mar 09, 2007 3:05 pm

Fievel wrote:Bloom County became Outland, which sucked horrible.
Opus is a beautiful and brilliant return/update to Bloom County form.


a.k.a "Cash Cow"
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Postby Lord Voldemoo on Fri Mar 09, 2007 3:27 pm

DinoDeLaurentiis wrote:
Fievel wrote:Bloom County became Outland, which sucked horrible.
Opus is a beautiful and brilliant return/update to Bloom County form.


a.k.a "Cash Cow"


so...like King Kong Lives only with more cash you cynical old bastard? :twisted:
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Postby DinoDeLaurentiis on Fri Mar 09, 2007 3:30 pm

Lord Voldemoo wrote:so...like King Kong Lives only with more cash you cynical old bastard? :twisted:


Et tu, Moo?

:wink:
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Postby buster00 on Fri Mar 09, 2007 3:43 pm

Cash Cow:

Image

Still funnier than "Funky Winkerbean."
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Postby Fawst on Fri Mar 09, 2007 4:24 pm

I'm sorry, the worst comic strip ever is EASILY Fred Basset. Example:

Panel 1. Fred walking down street spots Jacques, another dog, around the corner. "Oh no, it's Jacques!"

Panel 2. Fred turns to go the other way. He spots another dog. "And there's Manny!"

Panel 3. Fred is running full speed down the street being chased by Jacques and Manny. "Double trouble!"

HIGH-FUCKING-LARIOUS.

*sigh*
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Postby DinoDeLaurentiis on Fri Mar 09, 2007 4:26 pm

buster00 wrote:Cash Cow:

Image


One a man's cash cow, she is a the 'nother man's a dead horse, no?
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Postby Fievel on Sat Mar 10, 2007 5:12 pm

Lord Voldemoo wrote:
I hate to admit this, really, but I like Garfield. :oops: :oops: :oops:

It's like a security blanket, I always know exactly what to expect in advance.


That's precisely the reason I hate Garfield.
I absolutely love Get Fuzzy in comparison. To me, it's everything Garfield wishes it could have been - funny, unpredictable, cruel, sarcastic, etc. But then, I hate cats so when the main cat character is truly an evil bastard to be reckoned with, I dig it.

DinoDeLaurentiis wrote:
a.k.a "Cash Cow"


Not compared to dead horses like Ziggy, Cathy, Garfield, etc.
As an added bonus, the current political climate is perfect for Opus right now, so that helps.

Now, if my other two fallen comic strip gods (Larson & Watterson) would just come out of retirement.
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Postby minstrel on Sat Mar 10, 2007 5:31 pm

Larson and Watterson are geniuses.

In a way, I don't want them to come out of retirement. Their work is magnificent, and I wouldn't want to risk tainting it with later-career mishaps.

George Carlin used to be a pretty funny guy. Now he's an old grouch I can't laugh at at all. I would've preferred if he had retired in, say, 1990 or so.

I don't want that to happen to Larson and Watterson.
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Postby DinoDeLaurentiis on Mon Mar 12, 2007 10:23 am

minstrel wrote:George Carlin used to be a pretty funny guy. Now he's an old grouch I can't laugh at at all. I would've preferred if he had retired in, say, 1990 or so.


It's a funny you say that, eh? I was a thinking that a the putz, he was a just a hitting his a stride, no?
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Postby minstrel on Mon Mar 12, 2007 11:31 am

DinoDeLaurentiis wrote:
minstrel wrote:George Carlin used to be a pretty funny guy. Now he's an old grouch I can't laugh at at all. I would've preferred if he had retired in, say, 1990 or so.


It's a funny you say that, eh? I was a thinking that a the putz, he was a just a hitting his a stride, no?


I find him entertaining, just not funny. I think he's given up trying to be funny and now uses his HBO specials to rant about whatever he wants to rant about. He's a great talker, but he doesn't make me laugh.

Maybe I'm too young to be in his target audience.
:)
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Postby buster00 on Tue Sep 25, 2007 2:01 am

Brace yourselves for The Big Funky Winkerbean Cancer Death!

WHOOOOHOOOOOOOO!!

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Postby austenandrews on Tue Sep 25, 2007 5:34 pm

DennisMM wrote:Let's not forget "Drabble" or the homespun cheeriness and nine repetitive jokes that comprise "Rose is Rose."

Rose Is Rose is all about the artwork.

I'd say Get Fuzzy is all about the artwork, too, except GF's art is too repetitive. So I'm not really sure what anyone sees in Get Fuzzy.
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Postby DennisMM on Tue Sep 25, 2007 5:39 pm

I'm not fond of the artwork in Rose, but the creator does control her lines very well and handles different pens (or at least multiple swipes of one pen) with a good deal of craft. That doesn't make it worth the 15 seconds it steals from my life.

Get Fuzzy is just mean, and I like it.
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Postby Lord Voldemoo on Tue Sep 25, 2007 5:42 pm

if we had a zonie for best thread title, I think this thread should win it.

That is all.
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Postby Fievel on Tue Sep 25, 2007 6:02 pm

austenandrews wrote:I'd say Get Fuzzy is all about the artwork, too, except GF's art is too repetitive. So I'm not really sure what anyone sees in Get Fuzzy.


Get Fuzzy is everything that Garfield wishes it could be.
Garfield needs to get hit by a car, or mauled by a pit bull.
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