Mr. T's "Second Coming"

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Mr. T's "Second Coming"

Postby vicious_bastard on Sun Nov 27, 2005 1:04 pm

His words, not mine. Good to see him back.

Mr. T wrote:"We are going to start filming Rocky VI soon, with me as Clubber Lang again, and we're also starting work right now on my new show - which is called I Pity The Fool.

"Unlike all the other reality programmes, it is going to be about helping people. We're not going to be eating worms or swapping wives.

"For example a lady might write to me saying she's having trouble at a car dealership, because she's the only female employee and the men are harassing her. So I'll go in and straighten things out.

"I learn about the situation, observe for a couple of days and then call the guys into a meeting and give them the Mr T rap - 'I tell you fools, you don't disrespect no lady. My mum is a lady.'

"I don't get physical with anyone but I talk to them man to man and brother to brother."


More evidence that he is the nicest guy on Earth. The hurricane guilted him into giving up his jewellery.

"People need to see that Mr T has a heart of gold, not just the gold that drips around my neck.

"That's my wardrobe, my uniform, but I will never wear it again."


The show sounds hilarious. How could it not be? More power to him. Quotes from here. The show is bound to be on in the US first - give us a heads up, yanks.
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Postby Pacino86845 on Sun Nov 27, 2005 1:14 pm

Genius. That is amazing.
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Postby Cpt Kirks 2pay on Sun Nov 27, 2005 2:07 pm

Anyone know what Clubber Lang's character does in this film?

What do you think happened to Drago too?
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Postby vicious_bastard on Sun Nov 27, 2005 2:24 pm

I hope Drago turns up as a billionaire Abramovich type. With a few icy one-liners to relive the glory days. "I cannot be defeated" etc.
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Postby Flumm on Sun Nov 27, 2005 5:45 pm

So he's puttin down the dungerees, the chains (remember when we didn't have to hear the word "bling said every five minutes by clueless white TV presenters?), and he's off to preach to the viewers of reality TV eh? Well good luck to the guy, he sounds like he means it, and I wouldn't argue that whole new gneeration of kids, needs a bit of Mr T inside em.


Uhhh, fi you get my meaning.

And is this your first thread VB? What a way to break your cherry dude. Have you heard of that reality TV thing that's starting up over here? Where they convince a bunch of clueless wanna be astronauts, that they're going up into space?! Then mindfuck them by revealing it's all been a hoax?



:shock: :shock: :shock:



I'm seeing a Mr T crossover show...
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Postby vicious_bastard on Sun Nov 27, 2005 6:04 pm

No way is this my first. I posted one when I was 14.
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Postby Pacino86845 on Sun Nov 27, 2005 6:06 pm

Was that the one about Mr. T's new reality show chronicling his experiences in drug rehab?
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Postby vicious_bastard on Sun Nov 27, 2005 6:09 pm

T has seen it all before - he is wise. Come on Flumm, hit me with a photoshopped B.A. Break YOUR monging cherry.
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Postby Pacino86845 on Sun Nov 27, 2005 6:12 pm

vicious_bastard wrote:Come on Flumm, hit me with a photoshopped B.A. Break YOUR monging cherry.
This may simply be English jargon... but perhaps it's a Brain Twister candidate. Can I get confirmation from a Brit that this sentence makes no sense whatsoever?
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Postby Flumm on Sun Nov 27, 2005 6:17 pm

vicious_bastard wrote:T has seen it all before - he is wise. Come on Flumm, hit me with a photoshopped B.A. Break YOUR monging cherry.


No pacino, that's not a Brain Twister nomine, it's most definately an IMPAMPILASH though.

:wink: :lol:


Even if it only achieves the full effect to a very particular audience member.

:roll:
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Postby vicious_bastard on Sun Nov 27, 2005 6:18 pm

Haha. To 'mong' a photo is to mess around with it. A word I picked up somewhere. Not sure why I put 'your' in all capitals. You'll have to get up pretty early in the morning to catch me with a 'braintwister'. In fact, you'll have to stay up all night.

I love that line
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Postby ONeillSG1 on Sun Nov 27, 2005 11:37 pm

Clubber Lang will probably be a mentor role like Apollo Creed was in IV.

Why? I don't know but hey why the heck not.
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Postby The Garbage Man on Mon Nov 28, 2005 1:01 am

Mr. T once punched Chuck Norris at the exact moment he roundhouse kicked Mr. T in the chest. The result was the 80's.

Other fun facts.
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Postby bluebottle on Mon Nov 28, 2005 1:37 am

I met Mr. T when i was a teenager, he was doing some charity walk in toronto. He was all, "come on fools, keep movin'!"

and i was like, "man, you're short"

true story.
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Postby Cpt Kirks 2pay on Mon Nov 28, 2005 11:02 am

Bring Mr T back ruins his dangerous scary mystique. He's got nothing more to add. No more Mr Bad Guy is needed. What happens to him etc. His story is over!!

I don't wanna see him back as a nice guy either. Just leave it Sly, just leave it or they'll be trouble awiiight!?!?
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Re: Mr. T's "Second Coming"

Postby so sorry on Mon Nov 28, 2005 1:10 pm

vicious_bastard wrote:His words, not mine. Good to see him back.

Mr. T wrote:"We are going to start filming Rocky VI soon, with me as Clubber Lang again, and we're also starting work right now on my new show - which is called I Pity The Fool.

"Unlike all the other reality programmes, it is going to be about helping people. We're not going to be eating worms or swapping wives.

"For example a lady might write to me saying she's having trouble at a car dealership, because she's the only female employee and the men are harassing her. So I'll go in and straighten things out.

"I learn about the situation, observe for a couple of days and then call the guys into a meeting and give them the Mr T rap - 'I tell you fools, you don't disrespect no lady. My mum is a lady.'

"I don't get physical with anyone but I talk to them man to man and brother to brother."


Did anyone else read this in a "Mr T voice"?
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Postby Cpt Kirks 2pay on Mon Nov 28, 2005 3:09 pm

No.


















































(He said in a Mr T voice.)
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Re: Mr. T's "Second Coming"

Postby vicious_bastard on Mon Nov 28, 2005 3:24 pm

so sorry wrote:
vicious_bastard wrote:"I learn about the situation, observe for a couple of days and then call the guys into a meeting and give them the Mr T rap - 'I tell you fools, you don't disrespect no lady. My mum is a lady.'


Did anyone else read this in a "Mr T voice"?


I read that end bit in a DOUBLE Mr. T voice. T doing T.
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Postby Keepcoolbutcare on Mon Nov 28, 2005 7:30 pm

I've read this entire thread in Eddie Murphy doing Mr. T's voice...

Eddie Murphy: I have nightmares about g@y people. I have this nightmare that I go to Hollywood, and find out Mr. T is a stick. Really. And he'd be walking up to people going:
Mr. T voice "Hey boy, hey boy! Ya look mighty cute in them jeans. Now come on over here... and fuck me up the ass! C'mon. I'm gonna bend over now. Grrr! Aaahh! Hey, boy, slow down, you're gonna mess around and come too fast. You'll make me get mad and I'll clench up my butt cheeks and rip your dick off!"


and then you get a great payoff in Raw

"Mr. T. was gonna fuck Ed up...and I was scared 'cuz ya'll seen Mr. T., he don't look like, ya know, he can't fight, he looks like he can whup some ass right? And I was petrified, I was walkin' around at parties and people said Mr. T. was lookin' for you, he was walkin' up to people goin "I'm gonna whup Eddie Murphy's ass when I see 'im"
Then I watched the show, to see what kind of guy he was, and the character on the show ain't too bright, so if he came up to me I figured I can use the old Jedi Mind Trick on him...so he walked up to me and goes "I heard you said some jokes about me" "No I didn't" "Maybe you didn't...I'm gonna beat up the fool that told me them lies".
Personally, I'm an atheist in the voting booth and a theist in the movie theatre. I separate the morality of religion with the spirituality and solace of it. There is something boring about atheism.
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Postby Pacino86845 on Mon Nov 28, 2005 7:42 pm

IPAMPILASH!

Isn't it about time you go Toshiro already??!! I gotta go to bed you know!
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Postby The Garbage Man on Mon Nov 28, 2005 8:03 pm

Eddie Murphy: I have nightmares about g@y people. I have this nightmare that I go to Hollywood, and find out Mr. T is a the one I desire. Really. And he'd be walking up to people going:
Mr. T voice "Hey boy, hey boy! Ya look mighty cute in them jeans. Now come on over here... and fuck me up the ass! C'mon. I'm gonna bend over now. Grrr! Aaahh! Hey, boy, slow down, you're gonna mess around and come too fast. You'll make me get mad and I'll clench up my butt cheeks and rip your dick off!"


Interesting, considering the current rumors that Eddie is, in fact, homosexual.
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