Official Wrestling Thread (With 100% More Dickbuttery!)

The greatest TV in history is being made right now. The worst TV in history is being made right now.

Postby Chairman Kaga on Sun Jun 18, 2006 2:51 am

Kilgore wrote:
buster00 wrote:
Kilgore wrote:
buster00 wrote:They're so real I can't tell the difference.

If these kids had any balls at all, they'd blade themselves at some point. But they don't.


Where's Buff Bagwell?


Shooting 'roids behind the bleachers at his high school, at that time.


And asking Scotty Riggs where to blow him.

Fixed.
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Postby Kilgore on Sun Jun 18, 2006 2:52 am

Chairman Kaga wrote:
Kilgore wrote:
buster00 wrote:
Kilgore wrote:
buster00 wrote:They're so real I can't tell the difference.

If these kids had any balls at all, they'd blade themselves at some point. But they don't.


Where's Buff Bagwell?


Shooting 'roids behind the bleachers at his high school, at that time.


And asking Scotty Riggs where to blow him.

Fixed.


very nice.
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Postby Brocktune on Sun Jun 18, 2006 3:49 pm

Kilgore wrote:
Chairman Kaga wrote:TNA is a mess.


True...but not as much as 'the new-vision ECW'


unfortunately, you couldnt be more right.

its been a real busy week, so i wasnt able to watch the ECW premier until last night. man, what a fucking trainwreck. the show was so shitty, i dont even know where to begin. i was instanly disappointed with the size of the venue. i found out later that they taped it with smackdown. i should have guessed. obviously, no matter how much they push it, if they let ecw stay true to what it was, they wont draw as many fans. i was hoping that vince would realize this, and book the ecw shows in the smaller venues that are less expensive, and that feel like an ecw arena should feel. the old ecw crowd isnt going to go in for a fucking smackdown taping. so you are totally alienating them, and thats where you are going to make any money that you are going to make. otherwise, its just another crappy wwe product that they dont seem to care too much about. this is especially disappointing after all of the smoke they have been continuously blowing up our asses about the return of ecw.

the zombie vs the sandman? worst angle ever. you have got to be shitting me. you cant think of anything more for the sandman to do than just show up and cane the shit out of some jobber? like i got so pissed. during that match, and the replay of the tazz/king match. i mean how many guys are there that need, and would love to work? and they have this shit with the zombie, and a repeat of the worst match of a pay per view that i already paid 40 bucks to watch? fuck you guys. there are about ten million guys, many of whom used to work for ecw, that should have wrestled at that show instead of the fucking zombie. and then i find out they are going to keep doing it? fuck thats stupid. and in addition to the sheer ridiculousness of the sandman zombie match itself, is the fact that in a gigantic arena, with mostly wwe fans, and some stupid song that nobody knows, the sandmans entrance doesnt work for shit. and his entrance is all hes got. well, that and the side russian leg sweep.
and that angle vs credible match? how lame was that. yeah, thats what ecw fans want to see as the rebirth of hardcore. one of the impact players coming out to job it to a wwe guy. i was so angry. and so disappointed. i understand their deal with the sci-fi channel is only for 12 weeks. i doubt it will last longer than 3 or 4 if they dont wise up and fucking realize that if you cant do something right, maybe you shouldnt do it at all.
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Postby havocSchultz on Tue Jun 20, 2006 8:57 am

soooooo.. what the fuck was up with all the male asses on Raw last night..but no - Maria's top always stays exactely in place...


and a question for the WiseOnes - so does RVD technically have 2 championships right now...when I was reading the results from OneNightStand on WWE.com they said after his match - he was instantly crowned thenew ECW world champion - and then that he is defending the WWE championship against Edge at Vengeance...so - if that is the case - isn't it guaranteed that Edge will win - so that Raw gets it's belt back...
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Postby Chairman Kaga on Tue Jun 20, 2006 3:17 pm

Essentially yes. Booking like they do stories don't always make sense.
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Postby Cpt Kirks 2pay on Tue Jun 20, 2006 3:22 pm

Anyone know what Stacy Keibler's

Image

up to at the moment?

Also, does she do any really sexy girl on girl fights where she gets the crap kicked outta her in loads of sexy ways and in loads of lycra outfits?

The pornographic the better.
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Postby Brocktune on Tue Jun 20, 2006 5:01 pm

Cpt Kirks 2pay wrote:Anyone know what Stacy Keibler's

Image

up to at the moment?

Also, does she do any really sexy girl on girl fights where she gets the crap kicked outta her in loads of sexy ways and in loads of lycra outfits?

The pornographic the better.


has she had her tits done?

in that picture, her breasts look much larger than they were the last time i saw her (a while ago).

if so, than thats a crying fucking shame. thats one of the things that made stacy like the hottest one. she was like natural.

after last nights raw (funniest first 5 minutes on RAW in a long time) i am just as unenthusiastic about tonights edition of ecw. especially considering the only match that they talked about last night is a fucking wwe match. cena, angle, orton and rvd? fuck you, vince.
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Postby Cpt Kirks 2pay on Tue Jun 20, 2006 5:06 pm

I do think they're done. They look it so much. But why it makes her body worth dying for (visually anyway) it is sort of a let down as she isn't real anymore. Also, with all that body slamming and having some chick like Lita pick you up, SQUEEZE THE MOTHERS OUT OF YOUR UPPER HALF!!! THRRRROOOOOOOWW YOUR BODY TO THE GROUND, AND WRESTLE THE TITS OFF YA!!!! - there would be sooo much chance of your tits exploding or at least getting pushed out of place.

Surely this stuff should happen no?
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Postby Brocktune on Tue Jun 20, 2006 5:12 pm

everytime i see lita, or trash stratus, or stephanie mcmahon, or torrie wilson take a bump, i always fear for the safety, and structural integrity of their comically oversized phony breasts.
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Postby Cpt Kirks 2pay on Tue Jun 20, 2006 5:16 pm

Yeah I can dig it man. Though normally everytime i see lita, or trash stratus, or stephanie mcmahon, or torrie wilson take a bump I always get a comically oversized Image, and then I fear for the safety of all the Medical Trial Saffas in this TV room.
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Postby Chairman Kaga on Tue Jun 20, 2006 5:19 pm

I think that pic is heavily tweaked since I can't find a pic of her with that much....."talent".
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Postby Cpt Kirks 2pay on Tue Jun 20, 2006 5:23 pm

There IS a picture of her naked I THINK. I 'Acquistioned' it on the net, but although she's topless, the face doesn't look like her. In fact it looks like the face of about the only decent looking bird that I ever went out with.
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Postby Brocktune on Tue Jun 20, 2006 5:28 pm

post that shit.
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Postby Cpt Kirks 2pay on Tue Jun 20, 2006 5:35 pm

it's on my external Hard Drive. I'll keep you, er posted.

In the meantime, and for more proof that it might not have been photo enhanced, bust dees..
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Postby buster00 on Tue Jun 20, 2006 5:36 pm

I dunno about Stacey, but only ONE thing could make me click from the hockey game last night...

Bra And Panties Match featuring Mickie James & Candice vs. Torrie Wilson & Maria.

More like this, please!!
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Postby Brocktune on Tue Jun 20, 2006 5:36 pm

that looks a little bit more like the stacy i know and love. no pun intended.
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Postby Cpt Kirks 2pay on Tue Jun 20, 2006 5:43 pm

Ok man, check dis out. Tell me what you think..

[IMG=http://i31.photobucket.com/albums/c375/CptKirks2pay/StacyKeiblerTotalNude.jpg]NSFWOOOHOOOO!!!!![/IMG]
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Postby wonkabar on Tue Jun 20, 2006 5:43 pm

Cpt Kirks 2pay wrote:Image


....Thank you.
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Postby Brocktune on Tue Jun 20, 2006 5:46 pm

Cpt Kirks 2pay wrote:Ok man, check dis out. Tell me what you think..

[IMG=http://i31.photobucket.com/albums/c375/CptKirks2pay/StacyKeiblerTotalNude.jpg]NSFWOOOHOOOO!!!!![/IMG]



wow.
thats a pretty good photoshop job.
either that, or that girl does bear a striking resemblance.

you banged a chick that looks like that, kirks? strong work buddy. what, was she a nurse?
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Postby Cpt Kirks 2pay on Tue Jun 20, 2006 5:51 pm

Damnit, can't get the link to look right. Anyways, you know Stacy better than I do. I think she looks too different in that pic, so I dunno if I buy it or not. Haven't seen enough of her to be sure, and you all know about the miracle of eye make up. She could/could not be her. Anyone got a magnifying glass and look for some beauty spots or moles?

I hooked up with this chick that looks like heryeeeeaaaarrrrsss ago, but never anyone as good since. Whenever I get blown out by a good looking chick or some Cuπt of a girl comes up and chats my mates up but not me, and I get all pissed off and weakened, I always think of this girl to make me feel better.

So, I've been thinking of this girl 238746283765873245 times then.
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Postby havocSchultz on Tue Jun 27, 2006 8:56 am

Ok, so I do like Van Dam - I've always thought he was a little short on personality (or his personality just kinda came through lame) - but he's got talent - even if while in WWE, he kinda just repeated the same moves over and over again...

But how long are they gonna stretch out his 2 Championship reign...
Hey, and guess what - Edge screwed Cena out of the championship again last night...

oh well -
And as cheesy as the whole DX thing might've been last night - I was still laughing quite a bit at Trips and HBK's mockery of the McMahon's...
Some of it was quite dead-on...

and I kinda like how Trips keeps mentioning "some dude" who knocked up Stephanie - and then he says that "that guy" must have a huge "cannon" that goes down to... and then Michaels always cuts him off at the last second...

nice to see them having fun...now have them win the tag team championship - have them dominate and fuck things up for awhile - and then - have them fall-out with each other "one last time" and they will have to go at it...

As much as the trips/hbk rivalry has been played out - I always enjoyed their matches...
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Postby Chilli on Tue Jun 27, 2006 9:19 am

heh. DX as tag champs... they'd never lose because the Tag Division in the WWE is pathetic.

Its been over two years and I STILL can't deduce why they stopped having Shelton Benjamin and Charlie Haas tagging together. One of the best tag teams of the 00 era.
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Postby Chairman Kaga on Tue Jun 27, 2006 9:28 am

I can't even think of a WWE tag team that's how shitty that is at the moment.
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Postby Kilgore on Tue Jun 27, 2006 10:18 pm

Any time there's a halfway decent team, they get split - see 'The Mexicools' and 'MNM' for the most recent violations. The only 2 decent tags right now are Kidman and Spanky, who are fun to watch but WAY small, and the 'New Pitbulls' Kid Kash and Jamie Noble, who should both be wrestling singles in ECW anyway. Other than that, there ain't much: The Gymini, who are boring, Scotty 2 Hotty and whoever is watching him do another job on Velocity, and Val Venis and Viscera, in the 'WTF are we going to do with these guys that are still under contract' category.

Though I am looking forward to 'The Highlanders' - they look like a fun update on the old 'Bushwackers' theme,
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Postby Pudie on Wed Jun 28, 2006 11:47 pm

Speaking of tag teams, I was watching TNAs "Best of the Bloodiest Brawls" DVD the other day and HOLY SHIT. Triple X -vs- AMW "Losing team disbands" match was awesome. One of, if not the best tag matches I can remember.
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Postby Chairman Kaga on Thu Jun 29, 2006 12:06 am

Wait so Kidman as in Billy Kidman is still running around?
Oh yeah and according to Lords of Pain the Imposter Kane thing has been dropped.
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Postby Kilgore on Thu Jun 29, 2006 12:09 am

Chairman Kaga wrote:Wait so Kidman as in Billy Kidman is still running around?
Oh yeah and according to Lords of Pain the Imposter Kane thing has been dropped.


Sorry, I meant Paul London - the floppy black hair confuses me - and 'Spanky' is the old indy name of Brian Kendrick, couldn't think of it last night.
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Postby havocSchultz on Thu Jun 29, 2006 12:11 am

Chairman Kaga wrote:Wait so Kidman as in Billy Kidman is still running around?
Oh yeah and according to Lords of Pain the Imposter Kane thing has been dropped.


well - makes sense seeing as how Kane gave Imposter Kane like 3 or 4 chokeslams on monday and just dragged him away - pretty much without a fight from Imposter...

hmmm...apparentely nobody liked it... so they ever gonna explain this "mysterious dude" from kane's past that was doing this...
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Postby Leckomaniac on Thu Jun 29, 2006 12:18 am

havocSchultz wrote:Ok, so I do like Van Dam - I've always thought he was a little short on personality (or his personality just kinda came through lame) - but he's got talent - even if while in WWE, he kinda just repeated the same moves over and over again...


RVD's personality doesn't transfer well from ECW to WWE. When he was in ECW he was awesome..."The Whole Fucking Show" and stuff like "420 your ass got smoked". That was great. In WWE you can't really get away with things like that anymore...so RVD has kind of been at a lost for personality. More than anything he is just a really cool guy who is athletic and has a plethora of moves. In ECW he got to show case these moves...WWE puts an emphasis of "trademark" moves...so he is limited to certain things.

Personally, I find the whole DX thing to be a bit rushed. Although I would love to see Randy Orton team up with Vince to take down DX. Orton is the perfect guy to be Vince's enforcer. Young, and cocky...its really a no-brainer. He is the perfect anti-DX guy. They could play up how Orton is young and the future of WWE while HHH and HBK/DX is old...tired...played out. It practically writes itself.
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Postby havocSchultz on Thu Jun 29, 2006 12:22 am

Leckomaniac wrote:
Personally, I find the whole DX thing to be a bit rushed. Although I would love to see Randy Orton team up with Vince to take down DX. Orton is the perfect guy to be Vince's enforcer. Young, and cocky...its really a no-brainer. He is the perfect anti-DX guy. They could play up how Orton is young and the future of WWE while HHH and HBK/DX is old...tired...played out. It practically writes itself.


Well - he'd certainly be better than the fucking guys from "Bring it On"

I like the DX thing - but has Trips or HBK fought anybody other than a McMahon or a Tear-Away Pants Wearing Show-Tune Singer to the power of 5 recently...?

It's cool to see them fuck around and do their shit - but give them something worth to do as well.

They should have Orton bring back Chyna and Fuck-Pac and start his own DX and then they can have a big all out war...
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Postby Kilgore on Thu Jun 29, 2006 12:31 am

havocSchultz wrote:
Chairman Kaga wrote:Wait so Kidman as in Billy Kidman is still running around?
Oh yeah and according to Lords of Pain the Imposter Kane thing has been dropped.


well - makes sense seeing as how Kane gave Imposter Kane like 3 or 4 chokeslams on monday and just dragged him away - pretty much without a fight from Imposter...

hmmm...apparentely nobody liked it... so they ever gonna explain this "mysterious dude" from kane's past that was doing this...


I'm sure they will, right after they explain why Viscera and Val are still working for them, but The Dudleys weren't worth the effort, what happened to the Junior Division - and Palmer Cannon, for that matter, and how they stole Buff Bagwell's soul and implanted it into Rob Conway.

On a semi related note, I would like to make a prediction for the next ECW on SciFi show:

Match one: Sabu kicks the shit out of Stevie Richards, Justin Credible or Al Snow.

Interlude one/match two: Tommy Dreamer gets the shit kicked out of him by the Big Show after taunting him.

Interlude two: That blonde chick that can barely talk argues with that dumb looking ass that no-one gives a shit about.

Vampire sighting.

Match three: Sandman kicks the shit out of either a lawyer, a lesbian, or a baby.

Match four/Interlude three: That dumb-looking ass mentioned previously beats either Al Snow, Stevie Richards, Roadkill or Justin Credible after the idiot blonde almost shows her cans to Tazz

Interlude four: For some unexplainable reason, the blonde tries to strip again. Gets stopped. Again, unexplained.

Match Five: John Cena, Edge, Kurt Angle and Rob Van Dam portion - two of these guys will wrestle an awesome match, which will have no finish because a third guy will start swinging at them, bringing out the fourth guy and rematches/new matches/title matches are made for a RAW show.

Post-taping - Balls Mahoney will be walking around the arena, picking up the chairs and finishing people's half-drank beers.

I hope I'm right!
Last edited by Kilgore on Thu Jun 29, 2006 12:36 am, edited 2 times in total.
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Postby Kilgore on Thu Jun 29, 2006 12:34 am

havocSchultz wrote:They should have Orton bring back Chyna and Fuck-Pac and start his own DX and then they can have a big all out war...


Don't say that ever again. That's not funny. Not even in the least. If it happens, we all blame you.
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Postby havocSchultz on Thu Jun 29, 2006 12:36 am

Kilgore wrote:
Post-taping - Balls Mahoney will be walking around the arena, picking up the chairs and finishing people's half-drank beers.




Thnx for ruining the ending d00ch!!!!!


:wink:
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Postby Leckomaniac on Thu Jun 29, 2006 12:44 am

MAJOR RAW SPOILER!

In an attempt to combat the newly re-formed DX...Vince, Shane, and Randy Orton re-from the new and improved CORPORATION! In the end...DX can't compete with Vince...so they enlist the help of the NWO!!! But the NWO will gain too much power so the Corporation becomes...THE CORPORATE NWO WOLFPACK! OMG!

You just wait!
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Postby havocSchultz on Thu Jun 29, 2006 12:45 am

Kilgore wrote:
havocSchultz wrote:They should have Orton bring back Chyna and Fuck-Pac and start his own DX and then they can have a big all out war...


Don't say that ever again. That's not funny. Not even in the least. If it happens, we all blame you.



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Postby Kilgore on Thu Jun 29, 2006 12:46 am

Leckomaniac wrote:MAJOR RAW SPOILER!

In an attempt to combat the newly re-formed DX...Vince, Shane, and Randy Orton re-from the new and improved CORPORATION! In the end...DX can't compete with Vince...so they enlist the help of the NWO!!! But the NWO will gain too much power so the Corporation becomes...THE CORPORATE NWO WOLFPACK! OMG!

You just wait!



What? No 'Nation of Domination 2006'?
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Postby Leckomaniac on Thu Jun 29, 2006 12:48 am

Kilgore wrote:
Leckomaniac wrote:MAJOR RAW SPOILER!

In an attempt to combat the newly re-formed DX...Vince, Shane, and Randy Orton re-from the new and improved CORPORATION! In the end...DX can't compete with Vince...so they enlist the help of the NWO!!! But the NWO will gain too much power so the Corporation becomes...THE CORPORATE NWO WOLFPACK! OMG!

You just wait!



What? No 'Nation of Domination 2006'?


HA! I actually developed that hwole bit while talking to my little brother...and I included a newly formed Nation of Domination...it consister of that Papa Shango rip off...Viscera...then they turn into the Ministry of Domination when the Undertaker triumphantly returns.

I left that part out because...well because I didn't really remember the whole thing when I was writing it up.
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Postby Chairman Kaga on Thu Jun 29, 2006 12:53 am

Classic stuff there.
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Postby Chilli on Fri Jun 30, 2006 11:55 am

Anyone else here dig TNA?

Samoa Joe rocks.
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Postby Leckomaniac on Mon Jul 10, 2006 3:44 pm

So DX has been around for a while now...and I am fairly unimpressed thus far. The fact that HBK has to "look away" because there are girls involved. Gosh how lame.

I did enjoy the "Stand Back" music video though.

So RVD lost both of the belts because he was busted with pot and suspended? Bummer. Total bummer. Now we have to deal with Edge and the "Rated R celebration".

Ugh.
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Postby Kilgore on Mon Jul 10, 2006 3:56 pm

Leckomaniac wrote:So DX has been around for a while now...and I am fairly unimpressed thus far. The fact that HBK has to "look away" because there are girls involved. Gosh how lame.

I did enjoy the "Stand Back" music video though.

So RVD lost both of the belts because he was busted with pot and suspended? Bummer. Total bummer. Now we have to deal with Edge and the "Rated R celebration".

Ugh.


I figured the DX reunion would have about a two-week shelf life, and then be beaten into a pulp for the following three months, and that's what's happening. Plus, is it really a 'reunion' when Road Dogg and Mr. Ass work for TNA, Chyna is certifiably insane and never to be invited back, and Suck-Pac is working for the MTV Wrestling show?

I'm less disappointed with Edge being WWE champ due the RVD's arrest, because Edge is interesting at least, and I'm starting to hate him the way I hated Triple H for about three years; he's a great bad guy. But Big Show taking the title in WWECW while Sandman keeps kicking the shit out of studly guys in shitty costumes is too much. I like Show, and I like hating him in WWECW, but that was way too fast - that belt should have gone to Sabu, Sandman, or Dreamer for the interim.

It's a little fast for a Heyman turn, as well, but what are you gonna do?
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Postby havocSchultz on Sat Jul 22, 2006 1:14 am

Kilgore wrote:It's a little fast for a Heyman turn, as well, but what are you gonna do?


It's never too fast for a Heyman turn...

Even when he's "good" - you just think it's him "playing that way" so as to distract somebody until he can eat their heart out when they're not looking...


And WTF is up with the Great American Bash now???

Marc Henry is hurt so Batista has to fight Mr. Kennedy...Kennedy...

Now I enjoy Mr. Kennedy...Kennedy... and his whole Kennedy Mic thing and the Mr. Kennedy........................................... .................................................. .................................................. .......................................Kennedy... thing - but really - 6 months we wait for Batista to come back and he gets a couple of minutes against Henry on SNME...

Oh well - I guess people just wanna see Batista kick anybody's ass...

And now Lashley can't compete because his doctor didn't clear him due to too many enzymes or something in the liver...
So the originally scheduled Triple Threat Match for the U.S. Championship will now be between just Finlay and Regal... ugghhh...

And Booker will probably walk away with the Championship - I don't see why they feel the need to build Booker up so much in smackdown...
Plus - Rey got the "last laugh" on Smackdown this week - so more often than not - it means he'll lose...

Then Batista will shove Booker down Sharmell's throat at SummerSlam and make, and and then wear them as, the new World Heavyweight Championship Belt...

and then Taker and Khali will BB-Q Finlay's "Little Bastard" in a Punjabi George Foreman Grill Match...
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Postby havocSchultz on Tue Jul 25, 2006 8:41 am

havocSchultz wrote:
And Booker will probably walk away with the Championship - I don't see why they feel the need to build Booker up so much in smackdown...
Plus - Rey got the "last laugh" on Smackdown this week - so more often than not - it means he'll lose...



Is this where I say "I told you so..."?
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Postby havocSchultz on Tue Aug 15, 2006 2:06 am

Image

Image

Image

Image


Back on RAW...


Next Monday...
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Postby Brocktune on Tue Aug 15, 2006 5:21 pm

so Dumbledore.
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The Official Wrestling Thread (Suck It!!!!!)

Postby bastard_robo on Tue Aug 15, 2006 6:18 pm

havocSchultz wrote:Image

Image

Image

Image


Back on RAW...


Next Monday...


DUMB!

They should of put him on Smackdown, as they are hurtin for stars right now.

Hell, a Hardy Reunion would fucking boost ratings and give the tag division a well needed boost right now

besides, what the fuck is jeff going to do on Raw?

Jobbed out thats what!

Each week, it'll be someone new!

Start slightly high with kane, then to be worked all the way down to Val Venis!

Hope he's glad he left TNA.
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Postby Brocktune on Tue Aug 15, 2006 6:23 pm

first, they bring jeff hardy's wife, shannon moore back. *ugh*

now this.
lame!

you are so right, robo. put his ass on smackdown.
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Postby Kilgore on Tue Aug 15, 2006 7:21 pm

I'd bet he would rather not get back together with Matt...holds him back.

Jeff's singles matches in TNA were a blast - granted, he was a tool the majority of the time he was there, but who cares? That dude does crazier shit than anybody on the current roster, including 'the extremists' in the new ECW.

Well...except for Tommy Dreamer. Nobody beats Tommy Dreamer when it comes to getting the living shit kicked out of you.

My bet is that Matt is returning to Raw as well - he's currently taking 'personal time' away from Smackdown most likely due to problems with either his attitude or his urine. So we get three months of 'are they getting back together' bullshit, then the inevitable reunion (WWE needs that time to put together a couple of believable tag-team opponents for them anyway). In the end though, I see a Matt v. Jeff 'war' in a year or so. But that's just a guess.

On the 'less of a guess' front, I'm pretty sure Lita won't be joining them again.
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Postby cap on Tue Aug 15, 2006 7:29 pm

It should be interesting to see what they do with Hardy. Hopefully they won't waste him. Vince has had a problem with getting guys back, and then not knowing what to do with them (ie Matt).

Maybe he can take Cena spot in his fued with Edge. I flat out hate Cena, he can job out forever as far as I am concerned.
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Postby Pudie on Tue Aug 15, 2006 7:30 pm

The hardys apart aren't that great. Together though, they were pretty awesome.
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