What TV shows (good or bad) have you appeared on?

The greatest TV in history is being made right now. The worst TV in history is being made right now.

What TV shows (good or bad) have you appeared on?

Postby banthafodderUK on Tue Aug 16, 2005 10:55 am

I'll start you off - I was a studio dancer on 'Dance Energy' on BBC2 for a few shows waaaaaaay back in 1991 (and yes, Normski was a wanker).

8)
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Postby DinoDeLaurentiis on Tue Aug 16, 2005 11:04 am

Shouldn't a this go inna the AICN Confessional?
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Postby thomasgaffney on Tue Aug 16, 2005 11:06 am

Well, I've never been on a show. The closest I ever came was in '93. I'm from the Philadelphia and the Phillies were playing Toronto in the World Series. The night before the 1st baseball game, a friend and I snuck into a bar (I was underage at the time). We ended up getting interviewed by the local sportscaster for the local news and just about every single member of my family and all my friends happend to catch the news that night. My mom wasn't too thrilled by turning on the tv and seeing me all drunk in some dive bar.
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Postby John-Locke on Tue Aug 16, 2005 11:32 am

I was one of the 50 guys on the first MTV UK Singled Out with Richard Blackwood and Sarah Cawood presenting. I got through to the Final Cut, then one of the camera men fucked up and we had to do it again. I didn't get asked a question second time around and had to go head to head with another guy in a cold Brussel Sprout eating competition, I put the whole bowl in my mouth and he only ate about 4 but I spat them all out when the time was out (about 15 Brussels in total) because I have never been able to swallow the fuckers, they taste that bad. As a result I was disqualified and he went through and eventually won, I've never seen it televised though and don’t think it ever was, I like to think as a result of my disgusting antics with the Brussel sprouts.
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Postby Adam Balm on Tue Aug 16, 2005 11:40 am

DinoDeLaurentiis wrote:Shouldn't a this go inna the AICN Confessional?


Or at least the shameless promotion forum..
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Postby banthafodderUK on Tue Aug 16, 2005 11:41 am

stop moaning
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Postby ThisIsTheGirl on Tue Aug 16, 2005 12:13 pm

Weeeeelll, my only TV appearance that I'm aware of was when I was 3 - my nursery was asked to come and advertise a new children's play area at Lee Longlands, a furniture store in Birmingham. My moment of fame came right at the end of the ad, when I slid down a slide. I wish we'd had a video back in those days, because I can't see me appearing on TV anytime soon.

I'm still reeling from the shock news that Bantha was on Dance Energy! DId you used to be a bit of a raver then mate? I know I'm on at least 3 rave videos from the old days, the best of which was Andromeda 8, the Eighth Wonder at The Institute, April 1994, but I think I'm on a Helter Skelter one too!
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Postby burlivesleftnut on Tue Aug 16, 2005 12:56 pm

Nothing here. If I see a video camera I walk the other way.
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Postby MasterWhedon on Tue Aug 16, 2005 1:14 pm

I was on Hell's Kitchen as a diner.

I did Wayne Brady a few times. You could catch a glimpse of me in the background.

I was in the front row of a short-lived sitcom/improv show called "On the Spot" for the WB. They'd flip around and shoot stuff in the audience and I was on a bit. They filmed a piece where we all did the wave and used it in their TV spots, so I saw myself for the whole three weeks the show was on the air.

I've gone to the Tonight Show a few times, was in the audience when Lionel Richie perfomed "All Night Long" from his greatest hits. Sounds lame, right? Well, not so much since he decided to run up in the audience and dance right next to me and my friends. The folks at home thought it was cool that I got 10 seconds on national television with Lionel Richie.

Oh, and my other Tonight Show moment was when Affleck was on plugging Daredevil (I think it was the same show, actually). He said to the audience, "Anyone ever heard of Daredevil before?" I let out a slightly-too-early "woo" and he looked in my general direction. My girlfriend was on the East Coast at that time, but she picked my "woo" out of the crowd.

I'm a TV whore. Not really, but yes.
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Postby DinoDeLaurentiis on Tue Aug 16, 2005 1:42 pm

burlivesleftnut wrote:Nothing here. If I see a video camera I walk the other way.


That's a because a you wanted inna over 23 states, eh?
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Postby DinoDeLaurentiis on Tue Aug 16, 2005 1:44 pm

John-Locke wrote:I've never seen it televised though and don’t think it ever was, I like to think as a result of my disgusting antics with the Brussel sprouts.


Hehe... making the PZ proud! I think it should a be alla our missions inna the lives to get onna the TV as a much as a possible anna destroy any hope of a the footage making it onna the air!
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Postby so sorry on Tue Aug 16, 2005 1:44 pm

MasterW, I'd love to hear some more details on the hell's kitchen bit.
did you arrive in a lamborghini or Hummerlimo.
did you really wait 2 hours for food.
was it any good.
did that m'aitre de dude really act like that?
dish, please.
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Postby John-Locke on Tue Aug 16, 2005 1:49 pm

Dish, Dish, Dish.
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Postby MasterWhedon on Tue Aug 16, 2005 2:15 pm

Well, I have a great many Hell's Kitchen stories...

I had just moved to LA and my friends were PA'ing on the show. They booked my girlfriend and I to come eat in the restaurant, fancy dinner. Sounded great. We were promised all the beer and wine we could drink and some pretty damn good food... and we were paid $50 each.

Yes, that's right!! Every time you heard folks on that show say Hell's Kitchen was sold out for dinner service, that's because they fucking paid them to be there!! Shameless.

Anyway, the food was phenomenal, though we DID wait forever and never got out deserts. (We were there the night the lady threw up.) We heard Gordon yell "Shut it down!!" and chew a few people out. JP IS EXACTLY THAT PRISSY, just a natural character.

Actually...

Shortly after we ate on the show, I was looking for work and they needed more PAs.... sooooooo.... I worked on Hell's Kitchen as the Kitchen PA for its last two weeks of filming and then two weeks after to do inventory and shit.

I got to see the whole ins and outs of the production and it was THE biggest clusterfuck of a show, just SO incredibly mis-managed from a production side.

We shot the thing waaaay back in October and it kept getting pushed and pushed, was originally supposed to be on the air in January.

The flashy cars were all shot in one night. My friend's job for two days was to line up folks who had nice cars from Craig's List and such to come and let us use them. They had actors and models come in and drive them up two feet, get out and pretend like they were going to dinner. They had some helicopters going overhead for, like, ten minutes to get all those aerials.

Working on a reality TV show, I will never look at one the same. I heard producers coaching contestants in the confessionals to get their sound bite. Here's an exchange I hear, almost word for word:

Producer: "So, how do you think you stack up against Ralph?"
Andrew: "Oh, I think he's good, but I think I'll pull through in the end."
Producer: "Do you think you can beat Ralph?"
Andrew: "Yeah, I think... Yeah, I can beat him."
Producer: "Can you say that?"
Andrew: "I can beat Raplh. Any day of the week. Raplh doesn't stand a chance!"


What the bleeding fuck?

Anyway, this has been a long post, but I've got a MILLION stories from that show. I have the distinct honor of having been chewed out by Gordon Ramsey during dinner service, and of having gotten hit on by Dewberry.

Crazy times...
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Postby DennisMM on Tue Aug 16, 2005 9:44 pm

I was once taped for a TV news report (damned hard to remember -- I think it was 5 seconds during the '88 election season, in Iowa), but it didn't make air.

So what? I was quoted in American Film, you putzes.
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Postby wonkabar on Tue Aug 16, 2005 9:51 pm

"Time of your Life", "Charmed"
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Postby docfalken on Tue Aug 16, 2005 9:52 pm

My time to shine came back in the mid90s when I got to be an extra on Austin Stories (the MTV "comedy" thing). I had 4 different scenes I got to be a part of.
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Postby wonkabar on Tue Aug 16, 2005 9:56 pm

Oh yeah, those were both extra gigs. But I was "featured" on Charmed. Damn, Rose McGowen is short.
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Postby Pacino86845 on Wed Aug 17, 2005 5:54 am

Do home videos count? If so, then I'm a bleedin' star!!
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Postby ThisIsTheGirl on Wed Aug 17, 2005 6:27 am

MasterWhedon wrote:What the bleeding fuck?


This is the funniest phrase I've heard in a long time - again, I find myself guffawing at my desk, much to the bemusment of those around me. I don't think I slept properly last night.......
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Postby Agent Alonzo on Wed Aug 17, 2005 6:57 am

Hit on by Dewberry? Damn, I think that even beats my being bought a beer by Tom Jones...

Also, does a blurred face on COPS count?
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Postby John-Locke on Wed Aug 17, 2005 7:03 am

What were you being arrested or something?

Why is it that the criminals on cops never have a T-Shirt on and normally have a mullet?
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Postby Agent Alonzo on Wed Aug 17, 2005 7:05 am

(a) To show of the new tattoo got for $3 dollars at the nearest bar.
(b) Chicks dig the mullet.
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Postby Man-in-the-Box on Wed Aug 17, 2005 7:12 am

The folks at home thought it was cool that I got 10 seconds on national television with Lionel Richie.


I'd pay money for that honor... if I got to choke him to death.
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Postby Man-in-the-Box on Wed Aug 17, 2005 7:14 am

Also, does a blurred face on COPS count?


...or a blurred butt on Reno 911.
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Postby vicious_bastard on Wed Aug 17, 2005 9:53 pm

banthafodderUK, you may have inadvertantly taught me 'the running man'! I was on Caterpillar Trail as a nipper, my whole class was. Sadly before video recorders became affordable. I copped a good feel of a frog AND dug some holes.
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Postby Brocktune on Wed Aug 17, 2005 10:06 pm

hit on by dewberry. man that is hilarious. i cant even begin to tell you how many gut busting laugh-a-thons i had at dewberry's expense. even well after he was gone mind you. of course, i was always loaded out of my mind when i watched that show. hey, remember that time chef ramsay said that somebody's dish looked or tasted like dewberrys dogs dinner? man i almost died. this was so funny for so many reasons. i mean, he slams dewberry and his fucking dog all in one go. it was funnier still, because dewberry was long gone at that point, so the ridicule clearly was not intended to goad dewberry into performing better, just a huge slam from out of nowhere, because chef ramsay thinks hes such a worthless fuck..... i guess im getting off topic here.
i was in the audience for a taping of "sun up san diego" which hasnt been on in like 20 years. also i was on tv at a wwf pay per view. i even made it on to the dvd!
now, please, MasterWhedon please regale us with more hilarity from the set of "Hells Kitchen"
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Postby Brocktune on Wed Aug 17, 2005 10:08 pm

oh yeah, i almost forgot. i was on an episode of "The Price Is Right" once. not as a contestant mind you (im far too ugly fo tv) but you do see me in a couple of sweeps over the audience. and you can totally hear me yelling "ONE DOLLAR" at every single contestant everytime anybody bid on anything.
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Postby Brocktune on Wed Aug 17, 2005 10:10 pm

wonkabar wrote:Oh yeah, those were both extra gigs. But I was "featured" on Charmed. Damn, Rose McGowen is short.

thats because she is so fucking hot that the moisture in her body is perpetually evaporating, thusly causing her to shrink.
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Postby wonkabar on Wed Aug 17, 2005 10:13 pm

Her nipples were the best thing about "Scream"
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Postby Brocktune on Wed Aug 17, 2005 10:35 pm

word. you speak sooth my friend
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Postby Tyrone_Shoelaces on Wed Aug 17, 2005 10:59 pm

I was in the audience of a talk show on KOMO in Seattle back in 92. The tape is around here somewhere. They had on some kid whose 7th grade teacher had molested him. When they showed a picture of the teacher I was convinced he was guilty; totally looked like the kind of guy who would put on a raincoat and go to the roller rink by himself.
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Postby banthafodderUK on Thu Aug 18, 2005 8:39 am

Yeah vicious bastard - I taught everyone the running man (even mc hammer)

so how did you find out about the phantom zone man??
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Postby ThisIsTheGirl on Thu Aug 18, 2005 9:12 am

Hey, MC Hammer was <b>born</b> knowing the running man!

Seriously though Bantha, how did you come to be dancing on D:E?
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Postby banthafodderUK on Thu Aug 18, 2005 9:32 am

A few of us were out clubbing and were approached by a member of their production team (i thought they were taking the piss). We filmed a few shows over a month at Bbc shepherd's bush - it was a bit fake tho - there are a lot fewer people in the crowd than it seems (they also made us change clothes twice so it looked like they had more people there). Normski was a complete snobby gentleman - giving it all the cool homey shit, then speaking with a posh accent as soon as the camera stopped.

Still a laugh tho :)
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Postby ThisIsTheGirl on Thu Aug 18, 2005 10:22 am

It's a good story to be able to tell though - I remember when peopl really took all of that Def II crap seriously!

So were you more into hardcore or house in those days?
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Postby vicious_bastard on Thu Aug 18, 2005 10:42 am

ThisIsTheGirl wrote:Hey, MC Hammer was <b>born</b> knowing the running man!

Seriously though Bantha, how did you come to be dancing on D:E?


Not born doing the running man I hope, for Mrs Hammer's sake.
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Postby banthafodderUK on Thu Aug 18, 2005 10:59 am

Hip-hop (I used to be a wigger!)- then house. (Hardcore was a little bit too much unless i was completely off my tits).

Def II was run by a middle-class, middle-aged white woman (and Magenta DeVine was - and still is - a complete gentleman)
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Postby ThisIsTheGirl on Thu Aug 18, 2005 11:51 am

Nice!

I thought Def II was another of Janet Street Porter's creations - all that yoof tv shit seems a bit embarrassing when you look back on it.

I'm still impressed that you danced on the show though

On a slightly different note - X-Factor starts this saturday - and you know that the first week or two is made up almost entirely of total no-hopers who think they can sing. I recommend it if you missed last year's x-factor, I saw some of the funniest shit I've seen on TV in ages....
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