Simpsons Quotes

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Postby Ribbons on Fri Jan 06, 2006 11:23 pm

minstrel wrote:In Moe's tavern:

Moe: Barney, show these two the exit.
Barney: There's an exit??


LOL
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Postby Fried Gold on Fri Jan 06, 2006 11:47 pm

"I'm sorry. We didn't all go to Gudger College."
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Postby Keepcoolbutcare on Thu Jan 19, 2006 12:47 pm

how 'bout a quote about the Simpsons?

Pitchfork wrote:White Stripes to Appear on "The Simpsons"
Matthew Solarski reports:
It happened to the Smashing Pumpkins. And Sonic Youth. Not to mention Metallica, Radiohead, R.E.M., 50 Cent, Tom Jones, and yes, even Baha Men. And now it will happen to everyone's favorite yappin', yollerin', doorbell-thinkin' divorcee duo the White Stripes: Simpson-ization. According to MTV.com, the Stripes will provide voices for two-dimensional approximations of themselves in a forthcoming episode of "The Simpsons". Which is perhaps only half as cool as being rendered in Legos, but still!

According to MTV, the episode depicts Bart's presumably zany attempt to become a jazz drummer. Following a parody of the Stripes video "The Hardest Button to Button", Bart meets up with Meg and Jack and cartoon hilarity no doubt ensues. The episode, which will air in the fall, is called "Jazzy and the Pussycats", a pun so unbelievably hopeless even we couldn't have thought it up. Doh!


noice! Tho' I much preferred it back in the day when guests would actually be characters, not just themselves.
Personally, I'm an atheist in the voting booth and a theist in the movie theatre. I separate the morality of religion with the spirituality and solace of it. There is something boring about atheism.
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Postby Autumn on Thu Jan 19, 2006 12:49 pm

Spinal Tap before they go on stange reacting to the puddles of water everywhere -

"This is a rock concert, not the bleedin'
splish-splash show!''
"This is a rock concert, not the bleedin'
splish-splash show!''
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Postby Retardo_Montalban on Thu Jan 19, 2006 9:32 pm

keepcoolbutcare wrote:how 'bout a quote about the Simpsons?

Pitchfork wrote:White Stripes to Appear on "The Simpsons"
Matthew Solarski reports:
It happened to the Smashing Pumpkins. And Sonic Youth. Not to mention Metallica, Radiohead, R.E.M., 50 Cent, Tom Jones, and yes, even Baha Men. And now it will happen to everyone's favorite yappin', yollerin', doorbell-thinkin' divorcee duo the White Stripes... The episode, which will air in the fall, is called "Jazzy and the Pussycats", a pun so unbelievably hopeless even we couldn't have thought it up. Doh!


noice! Tho' I much preferred it back in the day when guests would actually be characters, not just themselves.


This is the exact reason I can't watch Simpsons anymore. I want Joe Namath talking about vapour lock. Not Jack White mouthing some hip trendy sound bite thats hip but not funny.

Vapour lock is no joke.
How about when Leonard Nimoy is narrating an episode, but he cuts loose a whole segment early and that nerdy pimple kid has to finish the story?
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Postby Keepcoolbutcare on Thu Jan 19, 2006 9:37 pm

The Springfield Files, I think.
Personally, I'm an atheist in the voting booth and a theist in the movie theatre. I separate the morality of religion with the spirituality and solace of it. There is something boring about atheism.
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Postby John-Locke on Thu Jan 19, 2006 9:37 pm

I saw what I thought was one of the best New Episodes in Years last weekend, when they went to Italy to pick up Mr Burns Sports Car, so many PAMP worthy moments it's hard to pick one but the Bambino Sideshow Bob crying Vendetta after the Butterfly was pretty funny.
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Postby Ribbons on Thu Aug 10, 2006 10:37 pm

I just watched a new Simpsons episode tonight that was pretty PAMP-worthy too. This quote in particular stood out:

Lisa: "I know! I could be an archaeologist!"

Forlorn Archaeologist: "Don't do it, little girl. I've spent the last 35 years of my life brushing the teeth of dead monsters..."
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Postby dimnix on Thu Aug 10, 2006 10:44 pm

It's rare that I catch an older episode that I havent seen multiple times (I havent watched the last couple seasons so much, though, mainly because I've been busy) - but the other day I caught an episode that is atleast 5 years old (as the Twin Towers of the WTC play a big part in the story) but I'd never seen it, and I thought it was fucking great.

Involved the simpsons heading out to New York.

And it had a reference to the C.H.U.Ds.
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Postby Tyrone_Shoelaces on Thu Aug 10, 2006 11:01 pm

I love that episode. It has one of my favorite Homer bits in it.

Homer: "Now I need something to drink."
Street Vendor: "I have crab juice and Mountain Dew."
Homer: "Eewww, give me the crab juice."
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Postby tangerine on Fri Aug 18, 2006 7:40 pm

my favourite episode ever is the film festival:

"It was a gummi bear!"
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Postby sleepflower on Fri Aug 18, 2006 7:58 pm

My favourite simpsons episode was the one where homer was promoted and overseen by a guy i dont remember ther name of, and homer had hair. Homer was found out and the guy went aaway, but threw homer his umbrella..... I cried.
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Simpsons Quotes

Postby bastard_robo on Wed Aug 23, 2006 10:46 pm

Hi! Im Troy MaClure. You might remember me from such nature films as "Earwigs, EWW" and "man vs. Nature: the road to victory"
Nobody exists on purpose. Nobody belongs anywhere. Everyone is gonna die. Come watch TV
— Rick and Morty

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Postby nodforlife on Thu Aug 24, 2006 12:03 am

DENTAL PLAN! Lisa needs braces. DENTAL PLAN! Lisa needs braces. DENTAL PLAN! Lisa needs braces. DENTAL PLAN! Lisa needs braces. DENTAL PLAN! Lisa needs braces. DENTAL PLAN! Lisa needs braces. DENTAL PLAN! Lisa needs braces.

On a side note, Entertainment weekly came out with their list of the top 25 episodes ever. You can find it here.
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Simpsons Quotes

Postby bastard_robo on Thu Aug 24, 2006 1:33 am

A possem died in the pool, do you have a trash bag?

Ahh! Just throw it over the fence, let Arby's deal with it!
Nobody exists on purpose. Nobody belongs anywhere. Everyone is gonna die. Come watch TV
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Postby colonel_lugz on Thu Aug 24, 2006 2:49 am

Homer: What am I supposed to do?

Brain: Pick up Bart! Pick up Bart!

Homer: Pick a bar? What the hell is pick a bar?!
You Called Down The Thunder, Well Now You Got It!
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Postby tangerine on Thu Aug 24, 2006 6:41 am

Oh, I love the brain conversations.

Brain: "Don't tell him your name, don't tell him your name!"

Homer: "Homer Simpson."

Brain: "D'oh!"
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Postby Flumm on Thu Aug 24, 2006 6:47 am

Crazey Eyed 'Copter Clingin' Sheep: TOMMAaAAaACOoOoOoOoO!!


***

Kent Brockman: Roads closed, pipes frozen, albinos...virtually invisible. The National Weather Surface has upgraded Springfield's blizzard from "Winter Wonderland" to a "Class 3 Kill-Storm"!
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Postby TonyWilson on Thu Aug 24, 2006 7:00 am

Troy McClure: Woohoo, I'm going to Seaworld!!!
Elitism is positing that your taste is equivalent to quality, you hate "Hamlet" does it make it "bad"? If you think so, you're one elite motherfucker.
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Postby so sorry on Thu Aug 24, 2006 8:43 am

Tyrone_Shoelaces wrote:I love that episode. It has one of my favorite Homer bits in it.

Homer: "Now I need something to drink."
Street Vendor: "I have crab juice and Mountain Dew."
Homer: "Eewww, give me the crab juice."


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Postby MonsieurReynard on Thu Aug 24, 2006 9:49 am

Lionel Hutz: Anyone care to join me in a belt of scotch?
Marge: It's 11am.
Lionel Hutz: I know, but I haven't slept in days.

Dr Nick: Don't worry, you won't feel a thing...till I jam this down your
throat!

Nuts And Gum...Together At Last!
Reynard City is back! Find out what the heck is going on at http://www.ecswebdesign.co.uk/wip/reynardcity/

*Free copy of Issue 1 *Reynard City Stories *An Audience With AK Girl and more...
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Postby moose4787 on Thu Aug 24, 2006 10:56 am

I saw an episode of jepordy the other day talking about Krustys side kick befor sideshow bob, and it was sideshow bob marly. I was wondering if anyone rembered that episode and if they do which one it is.
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Postby Tyrone_Shoelaces on Tue Aug 29, 2006 1:29 am

None of them can hold a candle to Sideshow Luke Perry.
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Postby Ribbons on Wed Dec 06, 2006 7:04 pm

"Kids are great, Apu. You can teach them to hate what you hate, and they practically raise themselves, what with the Internet and all."
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Simpsons Quotes

Postby bastard_robo on Wed Dec 06, 2006 8:41 pm

MARGE: "homer, there are a faimly of possums living in here"

HOMER: "I call the big one bitey"

-------------------------------------------------- -----------------------------------

HOMER: "YOU DID WHAT!"

BART: "I borrowed your toenail cippers, gezz"

HOMER: "Sorry, i've been upset all day since your mom told me she became a cop"

__________________________________________________ ___________

"Feeling better Bart?"
"never better"
"good, then your well enought to take your test"
"OHHHHH, my ovaries"
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Postby Tyrone_Shoelaces on Wed Dec 06, 2006 9:53 pm

Marge: "Oh dear, your father has traded our tools for M&Ms again."
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Postby Wolfpack on Wed Dec 06, 2006 10:45 pm

"She made us happy. And not church happy - for real happy." - one of the Flanders boys.
"Alright Shaggy - you and Scooby head over that way. The girls and I will go this way."
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Postby Tyrone_Shoelaces on Thu Dec 07, 2006 10:18 pm

Marge: "But Homer, you put Shake 'n' Bake in your coffee."
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Postby ONeillSG1 on Thu Dec 07, 2006 10:25 pm

The entire Scorpio episode. Sheer brilliance.
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Postby Nachokoolaid on Tue Dec 19, 2006 4:07 pm

I'm not the biggest Simpson's fan, but I remember there was one a while back where they had to form a baseball team, and there were a bunch of pros that did voices like Darrell Strawberry and guys like that. I remember a gag with Mr. Burns trying to swing a bat and when the ball made contact it knocked him down. Anyone else remember that? Pretty good episode.

And I still think The Raven episode from Treehouse of Horror is a classic.
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Simpsons Quotes

Postby bastard_robo on Sat Jan 06, 2007 5:13 am

And now, back to Blacula meet Black Dracula!
Nobody exists on purpose. Nobody belongs anywhere. Everyone is gonna die. Come watch TV
— Rick and Morty

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Postby Ribbons on Sat Jan 06, 2007 5:35 am

Oooh, sounds funk-ay!
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Postby havocSchultz on Sat Jan 06, 2007 10:43 am

Homer: Marge, it's Uterus, not Uteryou...
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Postby Ribbons on Mon Jan 22, 2007 8:05 am

Homer [talking to Marge]: "So what if the kids are growing up? Soon, they'll be leaving the nest. And then you'll have time to yourself. Hundreds of thousands of hours. And then, the peace of the grave. Well, goodnight."
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Postby tangerine on Mon Jan 22, 2007 8:31 am

I LOVE it when Bart is coming to play with Ed McBain's daughter, and Bart asks McBain what there is to do for fun at their house.

"We play uno, I chase you with the hose, no biggy."


HAHAHAHAH farking brilliant!!!!!
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Postby Ribbons on Thu Feb 01, 2007 4:37 am

Not exactly a quote, buuut...

Marge: "We have to do something to culture ourselves! We have to show people that we're more than just a town that's still afraid of eclipses!"

[cut to a shot of a newspaper that reads]:

"GOD STEALS SUN; MAYOR OFFERS SACRIFICES"
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Re: Simpsons Quotes

Postby Chairman Kaga on Thu Feb 01, 2007 8:51 am

bastard_robo wrote:And now, back to Blacula meet Black Dracula!

Next on our marrathon it's Blacula followed by Blackenstein and then the Blunch Black of Blotre Blame.
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Postby dimnix on Fri Feb 02, 2007 8:07 am

After a bit of thinking...

I think one of my favourite ever Simpsons exchanges is the following (probably a bit wrong):

"I've got to finish me message, it's the sky writer's code!"

"I'm so sick of that code!"
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Postby ThisIsTheGirl on Fri Feb 02, 2007 8:45 am

I know the "worst episode ever" has already been mentioned, but I particularly like the full quotation, so perfect for us Zoners:

Comic Book Guy wrote:Last night's Itchy and Scratchy was, without a doubt, the worst episode ever. Rest assured that I was on the Internet within minutes, registering my disgust throughout the world."


That's from the Poochie episode, which also contains one of my favourite lines, from when they are designing Poochie:

TV Exec wrote:Rastafy him by ten percent


(Poochie's cap is switched so it is back to front)



Another favourite, I swear my own dad lives by these words:

Homer wrote:Kids are the best, Apu. You can teach them to hate the things you hate. And they practically raise themselves, what with the Internet and all.



Actually, there are loads of funny internet references on the show - too many to mention here, so click the link...
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Postby Hollywood_Bob on Mon Apr 16, 2007 10:49 pm

OK I was watching the episode "The trouble with Trillions" on fox this evening whe Homer threw a great one when asked if he would spy on Mr. Burns for the IRS...and I quote...

"But Mr. Burns gave me my job at the nuclear power plant...and he didn't even fire me after 3 meldowns and one China Syndrome."


Classic
"The only way to rid yourself of tempation...is to yeild to it." Oscar Wilde

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Postby Ribbons on Thu Aug 02, 2007 1:07 am

"I'm seein' double! FOUR Krusties!"
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Postby LaDracul on Thu Aug 02, 2007 7:00 am

Lisa: Ewww, why is Courtney Love on the Wheaties box?
Marge: I thought it was Sandy Duncan...

Homer: It's a pornography store! I was buying pornography!
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Simpsons Quotes

Postby bastard_robo on Thu Aug 02, 2007 9:41 am

No one wants a comic published by Lens Crafters!
Nobody exists on purpose. Nobody belongs anywhere. Everyone is gonna die. Come watch TV
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Postby ThisIsTheGirl on Thu Aug 02, 2007 10:13 am

"Duffman! Cannot breathe!"
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Postby Chilli on Thu Aug 02, 2007 10:28 am

[a very tall man scrunched in a Volkswagen Beetle has just grabbed Nelson after being laughed at]
Tall Man: Do you find something comical about my appearance when I am driving my automobile?
Nelson: Yes.
Tall Man: Everyone needs to drive a vehicle, even the very tall.
[points to his Beetle]
Tall Man: This was the largest auto I could afford. Should I therefore be made the subject of fun, huh?
Nelson: I guess so.
Tall Man: [clears his throat] Would you like it if others laughed at YOUR misfortune, hmm? Maybe we should find out!
Tall Man: [Tall man pulls down Nelson's pants and commands him to walk down the main street] Nowwww march!
Tall Man: [honks his car horn while driving behind Nelson] Hey, everyone! Look at this; it's that boy who laughs at everyone! Let's laugh at him!
[the entire crowd yells HA-HA! at Nelson]


Love that entire exchange.
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Postby Zarles on Thu Aug 02, 2007 10:56 am

Watched Treehouse of Horror IV last night.

'Oh, they got me with the technical mumbo-jumbo!'
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Postby thebostonlocksmith on Thu Aug 02, 2007 12:40 pm

"When I first heard that Marge was joining the police academy, I thought it would be fun and zany, you know like that movie... "Spaceballs". But instead it was dark and disturbing, like that movie "Police Academy"."

I'm normally not a praying man, but if you're up there, please save me, Superman!
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Postby Chilli on Sun Aug 05, 2007 4:41 am

Boy: Hey Billy! Hey Joey! Come on in. There's plenty of room. Sorry, not you, Homer.
Homer: Why not!?

[boy points to sign, "No Homers Club"]

Homer: But you let in Homer Glumplich!
Homer Glumplich: [pops head out window] Hyuck hyuck!
Boy: It says no Homers. We're allowed to have one.
Homer: Oh.


Perfect Simpsons quoteage.
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Postby Jonathan Adams on Sun Aug 05, 2007 11:13 am

So many favourites...my all-time favourite episode is "The Stonecutters" but here's a few other memorable quotes

From "You Only Move Twice"

Homer: Uh... you have any sugar around here?
Hank Scorpio: Sugar? Sure.
[takes two handfuls of sugar out of his pockets]
Hank Scorpio: There you go. Sorry it's not in packages. Want some cream?
[reaches back into his pockets]
Homer: Uh...no

(Scorpio is threatening world leaders via video)
Scorpio: Hello gentleman...you have 7 hours to deliver the money and to prove I'm serious (presses button and bridge falls down)
Leader 1: We have to give him the money
Leader 2: It could have fallen down by itself...
Leader 1: We can't take that chance!
Leader 2: You never want to take a chance...I want to take a chance!

My favourite Ranier Wolfcastle

Sarge: Round here, McBain, we do things by the book!
(McBain shoots book through the wall)
McBain: Bye book

Mr. Burns: I can't be responsible for what my goons are ordered to do.

Meh so many...I love the Monorail episode too.
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Postby Maui on Sun Aug 05, 2007 11:14 am

"Doh"
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