Official X-Men: The Last Stand Review Thread [SPOILERS!]

New movies! Old movies! B-movies! Discuss discuss discuss!!!

With 10 being the best and 1 being the worst, how would you rate X-Men: The Last Stand?

10
4
3%
9
4
3%
8
20
17%
7
27
23%
6
18
16%
5
12
10%
4
9
8%
3
7
6%
2
3
3%
1
5
4%
I will not be seeing this/I am waiting for DVD
6
5%
 
Total votes : 115

Postby Adam Balm on Wed May 24, 2006 2:17 pm

He's not biting him. He's STFUing him. That's how dogs shut their cubs up in the wild.

He's saying 'Fuck! Get over it! Move the fuck on, he didn't know about tiny texting..'
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Postby MasterWhedon on Wed May 24, 2006 2:19 pm

Adam Balm wrote:Okay, I don't know why, but Zzzzzzzzzaaaaaakt always makes me burst out laughing uncontrollably like I just saw Kirk naked or something. I really have no idea why...

:oops:

It's like you just pantsed me in front of the cute girl I was trying to court.


...which, by the way, happened to me in gym class once--only my buddy accidentally pulled down EVERYTHING.
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Postby AtomicHyperbole on Wed May 24, 2006 2:20 pm

Adam Balm wrote:He's not biting him. He's STFUing him. That's how dogs shut their cubs up in the wild.

He's saying 'Fuck! Get over it! Move the fuck on, he didn't know about tiny texting..'


You had me up until I realised you think dogs know about the internet. FOO'!
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Postby so sorry on Wed May 24, 2006 2:31 pm

Adam Balm wrote:He's STFUing him.



here's another hairy animal saying STFU





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Postby Peven on Wed May 24, 2006 2:54 pm

MasterWhedon wrote:
Adam Balm wrote:Okay, I don't know why, but Zzzzzzzzzaaaaaakt always makes me burst out laughing uncontrollably like I just saw Kirk naked or something. I really have no idea why...

:oops:

It's like you just pantsed me in front of the cute girl I was trying to court.


...which, by the way, happened to me in gym class once--only my buddy accidentally pulled down EVERYTHING.




so, i guess she was laughing instead of in awe, eh?
that explains the uptightness over pics with a little skin posted on the Fantasy Art thread. :P :wink: :lol:


edit: p.s. i bet that girl would have appreciated a "spoiler warning" too. :P :lol:
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Postby wheredidigo111 on Wed May 24, 2006 7:30 pm

ZombieZoneSolutions wrote:Wellp, the Village Voice liked it:

http://www.villagevoice.com/film/0621,lim,73310,20.html

Why do I get the feeling that I am going to like this film despite
the fact that geeknation already "hates it" (you can always rely on
geeknation to bring the 'hate'; not having actually seen it
yet, but going to see it, multiple times, then buy several copies
of the DVD, all to 'prove' that they 'hated it', it 'sucks', and heres
a rambling, incoherent reason why; something to do with a long
forgotten corner of byzantine backstory minutae that nobody outside
of the unwashed, unloved, but very well fed crusty 800 pound comic
book guy knows or even remotely cares about...)

Point blank -- the average viewer hasn't internalized 20 years of
backstory and minutae, nor do they want to.

I don't expect X3 to be great, but I reckon of the reviews I read,
its OK and fun to watch, if somewhat disappointing given how
great the first two were.


See it? I'm a big X-fan and I'm going to miss it. Hell I'm going to boycott this pice of shit so called move. Tha's what I did when Batman & Robin and that's the king of pice of shit movies.
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Postby AtomicHyperbole on Wed May 24, 2006 7:33 pm

I take it you've not seen Xtro 3 yet then.
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Postby Flumm on Wed May 24, 2006 7:40 pm

I know this is thread all about how Ratner and co have blown this X Men out of the park and such and how happy everyone is now being able to vaction all year round in the chilly climes of Hell, and how this peace on earth thing is all workin out better than we expected, but I just I'd take a moment to wedge in...

tfactor wrote:is anyone else going to a sneak peek of this movie this week?

My brother got me an early birthday present yesterday - two tickets for 12:01am Wednesday night sneak peek of X-men: the last stand. I would have scanned a picture of the tickets because they are so damn pretty but apparently something chewed thru the power cable for my scanner/printer/expensive paper weight.

Anyway is anyone else going to a sneak peek?


:o

Michael:
Trevor, it's your birthday.
God bless you this day.
You gave me the gift of a little sister,
And I'm proud of you today.

Michael and Bart:
Lisa, it's your birthday.
Happy birthday, Lisa.
Lisa, it's your birthday.
Happy birthday, Lisa.

Michael:
I wish you love and good will.
I wish you peace and joy.

Bart:
I wish you better than your heart desires.

Michael:
And your first kiss from a boy.

Michael and Bart:
Lisa, it's your birthday.
Happy birthday, Lisa.
Lisa, it's your birthday.
Happy birthday, Lisa.

Bart:
Yeah!


Nothing says happy birthday like an inappropriate chosen and retrospectively creepy celebratory ditty.

Oh well, at least it's catchy.

A sincere Happy brithday to you, trev. :P :roll:

Whether the movie is good or bad, if nothing else, I hope you enjoyed yourself.

Now do we need spoiler tags to find out how old you are?
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Postby tapehead on Wed May 24, 2006 7:42 pm

right on, fight the power!
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Postby tfactor on Wed May 24, 2006 8:03 pm

That was very nice of you flumm buddy, thank you very much.

Yes 30 years and just about 12 hours ago, the clouds were dark above a doomed hospital, as the doctors had no idea as to what hell they were about to unleash upon this earth. But then my mother gave me the name Trevor, and suddenly being the son of satan was pushed to the side, apparently Beelzebub has a problem with the name Trevor so I was relieved of my world/heaven domination responsibilities and was left with only this demon size penis (I'm not saying if its a good thing or bad).

Anyway 30 years later here I am, and to those who don't know better DON'T read the god damn spoilers - if you hope to enjoy the movie, that is. That new guy almost tricked me into reading some details I didn't want to know about but trust this old man's words, frankly; you're better off without them.

Anyway thanks again flumm, cheers to ya my friend! I'm sure tomorrow morning I'll have my 2 bits to offer on this flick, but for now I have a date with a dirt nap.

see you soon, true believers
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Postby wheredidigo111 on Wed May 24, 2006 8:05 pm

AtomicHyperbole wrote:I take it you've not seen Xtro 3 yet then.


Well buurr.
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Postby AtomicHyperbole on Thu May 25, 2006 4:03 am

Wilbur?
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Postby doglips on Thu May 25, 2006 4:06 am

Another day and Atomic once again takes his position, ready to blindly defend his beloved X3 from the onslaught of fan-boy hatred.......
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Postby AtomicHyperbole on Thu May 25, 2006 4:21 am

How'd you get that from "Wilbur"?

I don't love it, I just don't already hate it. ;)
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Postby MisterCynic on Thu May 25, 2006 4:27 am

i just saw this.

and dudes.. this movie is not bad at all. imo its very worthy of being in the trilogy. yes it may be the worst 'film' in terms of character, dialogue, plot... cyclops and rogue are hideously underdeveloped, and there are a few cringe-worthy lines. but its not BAD per se. the mutant money shots and showdowns were pretty kickass. its a very cool take on dark phoenix in terms of the visuals of the thing. some of the action was ill-executed, but some of it was in my opinion, fantastic.

'oh my stars and garters' -- that made me giddy, it was perfect to me. like 'go get em, tiger'.

some of the inconsistency bothered me, stuff like magneto being all-powerful. its just not consistent with the film universe, or even the universe in general as i understand it. but hey, within the context of the flick it still works. pyro-iceman was fun, juggernaut and the muscle suit worked MUCH better than i thought it would. the danger room was still a ripoff, but what are you gonna do... even the calisto storm fights which have been getting flack were pretty cool to me.

overall, i recommend this flick. im shocked, i kind of grew real respect for brett ratner. amazing. not a lot of people could have done this in under a year or whatever its been. when did they start shooting, august? thats pretty fuckin incredible.

bear in mind, i went in with pretty low expectations. but still, i may buy this movie. its worthy of being in the trilogy imo.
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Postby AtomicHyperbole on Thu May 25, 2006 4:30 am

YOU RESPECT BRETT RATNER?

*faints*

;)

Good to hear, I guess this is how I'll feel about it too. Guess.
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Postby AtomicHyperbole on Thu May 25, 2006 4:38 am

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Postby MisterCynic on Thu May 25, 2006 4:43 am

in a way i wanted to hate this movie, too. i just couldnt. the scenes that were fun were just too much fun for me to hate the whole thing in the end.

3/5, that sounds about right to me. the cheesey lines arent whats going to stick with you if you like mutant ass-kicking. yes, techncially the movie is average or slightly above... but the action and confrontations elevate it, in my eyes.
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Postby AtomicHyperbole on Thu May 25, 2006 4:46 am

Would you therefore compare it to Sith, in some ways?
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Postby doglips on Thu May 25, 2006 4:49 am

AtomicHyperbole wrote:How'd you get that from "Wilbur"?


Just thinking outside the box :P
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Postby AtomicHyperbole on Thu May 25, 2006 4:58 am

B4NN3D.
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Postby MisterCynic on Thu May 25, 2006 5:19 am

AtomicHyperbole wrote:Would you therefore compare it to Sith, in some ways?


i think its better than sith. better acting, better dialogue. more deserving in xmen trilogy than sith in star wars saga. its just better.

better.
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Postby wheredidigo111 on Thu May 25, 2006 9:08 am

MisterCynic wrote:in a way i wanted to hate this movie, too. i just couldnt. the scenes that were fun were just too much fun for me to hate the whole thing in the end.

3/5, that sounds about right to me. the cheesey lines arent whats going to stick with you if you like mutant ass-kicking. yes, techncially the movie is average or slightly above... but the action and confrontations elevate it, in my eyes.


That what James Cameron said about Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines befor it opened and died in theaters everywhere.
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Postby unikrunk on Thu May 25, 2006 9:16 am

wheredidigo111 wrote:
MisterCynic wrote:i n a way i wanted to hate this movie, too. i just couldnt. the scenes that were fun were just too much fun for me to hate the whole thing in the end.

3/5, that sounds about right to me. the cheesey lines arent whats going to stick with you if you like mutant ass-kicking. yes, techncially the movie is average or slightly above... but the action and confrontations elevate it, in my eyes.


That what James Cameron said about Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines befor it opened and died in theaters everywhere.


James...Cameron...T3... :?


Whiskey
Tango
Foxtrot
He can't' love you back...
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Postby AtomicHyperbole on Thu May 25, 2006 9:49 am

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Postby tfactor on Thu May 25, 2006 10:48 am

I need validation!

So my tickets read "Thursday 12:01AM" which would have been last night at 1 past midnight right?

We get to the theatre and the doors are locked, so I'm banging on the windows and kicking the doors trying to get the attention of the cleaning people (who I know could hear me but were clearly ignoring me), because god damn it my ticket says "thursday 12:01 am" and I'm pissed and I want to see this fucking movie.

As Loews would have it the sneak peak isn't until tonight at 12:01am, the tickets are a result of a "software problem" at the theatre. And they had several people complain and several dozen show up for the show last night.

here's my question; doesn't the sneak peak always happen the wednesday night before the release?
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Postby raasnio on Thu May 25, 2006 11:01 am

Sneak peeks always happen early Friday morning (12:01 AM) Or late thursday night. At least that's the way it was when I used to work at a movie theater.

Sometimes movies open on wednesdays, but not sneak peeks.
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Postby tfactor on Thu May 25, 2006 11:08 am

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Postby MasterWhedon on Thu May 25, 2006 11:22 am

Ebert liked it!! Three stars!!

Roger Ebert wrote:The government has a Department of Mutant Affairs in "X-Men: The Last Stand," and it is headed by the mutant Dr. Hank McCoy (Kelsey Grammer), also known as Beast. The Mutant Community seems on its way into the mainstream, the goal long envisioned by Prof. Charles Xavier (Patrick Stewart), the head of the school where young X-Men learn to develop and control their powers. The school purrs along proudly with Wolverine (Hugh Jackman) as a role model, but then a kid named Leech surfaces, and all bets are off.

His body produces an antibody to mutation; inject it into X-Men, and their mutant powers disappear. They become regular folks with the same limited powers the rest of us use to scrape by. Leech is played by Cameron Bright, whom you may remember from "Birth," the movie where he was a child whose body was occupied by the mind of Nicole Kidman's late husband. Bright has large dark eyes and ominously sober features that make you think he might grow up to become chairman of the Federal Reserve, or a serial killer.

He's invaluable to the billionaire Warren Worthington II (Michael Murphy), who lives in shame because his son Warren III (Ben Foster), also known as Angel, has a 16-foot wingspan. A flashback shows young Angel in a room full of blood and feathers, having tried to cut the wings from his back. This self-hate is nurtured by Worthington, whose shame about his son translates into hatred of mutants in general. He buys Alcatraz, imprisons Leech, begins to manufacture the antibody and campaigns for a "cure" for mutation.

But what if mutants don't want to be "cured"? What if they're happy the way they are, and cherish their differences? Xavier has always tried to encourage that kind of thinking, but Magneto (Ian McKellen), his archenemy in X-Man land, takes a more direct approach. He wages war against Worthington and all those who would foist a "cure" on the mutants. Although Magneto has always been the villain of the series, this time he makes a good point.

So strong is Leech's anti-mutant power that a mutant need only stand near him to lose his or her abilities; maybe the antibody works through pheromones. Meanwhile, Mutant Cure Clinics spring up around the country and are picketed by pro-Mutant militants. Extremists arm themselves with guns that can fire the antibody, and go out to shoot themselves some mutants. Beast, as the administration's Cabinet minister in charge of mutant affairs, is caught in the middle.

There are so many parallels here with current political and social issues that to list them is to define the next presidential campaign. Just writing the previous paragraph, I thought of abortion, gun control, stem cell research, the "Dumbledore gene" and the Minutemen. "Curing" mutants is obviously a form of genetic engineering and stirs thoughts of "cures" for many other conditions humans are born with, which could be loosely defined as anything that prevents you from being just like George or Georgette Clooney. The fact is, most people grow accustomed to the hands they've been dealt and rather resent the opportunity to become "normal." (Normal in this context is whatever makes you more like them and less like yourself.)

"X-Men: The Last Stand" raises all of these questions in embryonic form, but doesn't engage them in much detail, because it is often distracted by the need to be an action movie. Consider, for example, the lengths Magneto goes to in order to neutralize young Leech. The kid is being held on Alcatraz? Very well then, Magneto will stand on the Golden Gate Bridge and use his powers of industrial-strength levitation to rip loose a whole span of the bridge and rotate it so that it joins Alcatraz with the mainland and his forces can march on Worthington's fortress.

Countless innocent citizens die during this operation, falling from the bridge or otherwise terminating their commutes. It seems to me that Magneto in this case is -- well, a terrorist. So fanatic is his devotion to mutants that he will destroy the bridge in the service of his belief. Xavier, however, is like (how does it go?) the vast majority of mutants who are peaceful and responsible citizens.

One of the distractions in all the "X-Men" movies is that the X-Men are always getting involved in local incidents that have little to do with the big picture. They demonstrate their powers during disagreements and courtships, neighborhood emergencies, psychological problems or while showing off. After three movies you'd think they would have learned to coordinate their efforts, so that Storm (Halle Berry), for example, is not suddenly needed to brew up a last-minute storm and save the neighborhood/city/state/world.

My guess is there are just plain too many mutants, and their powers are so various and ill-matched that it's hard to keep them all on the same canvas. The addition of Beast, Angel and Leech, not to mention Multiple Man, Juggernaut and the revived Dr. Jean Grey (reborn as Dark Phoenix) causes a Mutant Jam, because there are too many X-Men with too many powers for a 104-minute movie. There are times when the director, Brett Ratner, seems to be scurrying from one plot line to another like that guy who had to keep all of his plates spinning on top of their poles.

All the same, I enjoyed "X-Men: The Last Stand." I liked the action, I liked the absurdity, I liked the incongruous use and misuse of mutant powers, and I especially liked the way it introduces all of those political issues and lets them fight it out with the special effects. Magneto would say this is a test of survival of the fittest. Xavier would hope they could learn to live together.

His and Roeper's audio review is HERE. Two thumbs up.
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Postby swadetheking on Thu May 25, 2006 12:02 pm

Well i just saw this .. and well i REALLY liked it. It wasnt the piece of shit harry and the crew have been making it up to be fandom or not. I didnt mind that it felt rushed cos frankly I didnt want to sit through a 3 hour epic, Which is all you guys seem to really want ... I think. My only complaint is that the battle at the end didnt have ENOUGH mutants they all just
*******SPOILER***********
died
*************ENDSPOILER***********************
like regular humans
that is all
The King has spoken..
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Postby ZombieZoneSolutions on Thu May 25, 2006 1:28 pm

Sooo... despite all the anal-retentive hand-wringing and hatevomit spewing
forth from the mouths of GeekNation, it turns out that X3 is actually pretty
damn good? Well, that makes me happy. I love me some XMen. Great
story, great characters, and the timeless theme of the oppressed and
disenfranchised fighting for their equal rights.

Once again, the AICN "Hate" Patrol is proven to be completely full of
shit. Not the first and certainly not the last time. I can't wait to read
the re-writing of the reviews we'll see once the DVD comes out. Its gonna
be a larff!

Can't wait until Friday! Looks like X3 is gonna be a whole helluva lotta fun.

67% over at ROTTEN TOMATOES. Yay!
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Postby Cpt Kirks 2pay on Thu May 25, 2006 1:44 pm

67% AND RISING. rISE!!!

RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIISE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Who wrote that 5/5 review on Rotten Tomatoes? The foreign one? Can anyone speak Spanish or whatever, here??
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Postby athenabodicea on Thu May 25, 2006 1:47 pm

Cpt Kirks 2pay wrote:Can anyone speak Spanish or whatever, here??


Go here!!!

EDIT: :roll:
Last edited by athenabodicea on Thu May 25, 2006 1:52 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby ZombieZoneSolutions on Thu May 25, 2006 1:49 pm

Cpt Kirks 2pay wrote:67% AND RISING. rISE!!!

RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIISE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Are you saying that in your Sidious/Palpatine voice?

Like, MOOOOOOOOSTAAAAAAAAAFAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRR
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Postby Cpt Kirks 2pay on Thu May 25, 2006 1:53 pm

ZombieZoneSolutions wrote:
Cpt Kirks 2pay wrote:67% AND RISING. rISE!!!

RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIISE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Are you saying that in your Sidious/Palpatine voice?

Like, MOOOOOOOOSTAAAAAAAAAFAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRR


No, more like Kenneth Branagh going 'LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVE!!!! LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVE! LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!' in Frankenstein.

PS. I had a little night one thing going on with a girl named Liv in Sydney. She looked like Xenia Onatopp - and she fucked my head right up.
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Postby ZombieZoneSolutions on Thu May 25, 2006 2:23 pm

Cpt Kirks 2pay wrote:
ZombieZoneSolutions wrote:
Cpt Kirks 2pay wrote:67% AND RISING. rISE!!!

RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIISE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Are you saying that in your Sidious/Palpatine voice?

Like, MOOOOOOOOSTAAAAAAAAAFAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRR


No, more like Kenneth Branagh going 'LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVE!!!! LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVE! LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!' in Frankenstein.

PS. I had a little night one thing going on with a girl named Liv in Sydney. She looked like Xenia Onatopp - and she fucked my head right up.


Noice! Now, when you say she fucked yr head right up, yr meaning in
a 'this is exactly what Kirk has been waiting for!' way or a "NOT ANOTHER
DISAPPOINTMENT!!!!!!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!" way? I hope it was
the former. The pipes, they must be cleaned... or beaten...
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Postby MasterWhedon on Thu May 25, 2006 3:28 pm

Entertainment Weekly gives it a B-.

Lisa Schwarzbaum, Entertainment Weekly wrote:When the mighty band who made X-Men: The Last Stand strode into Cannes recently to promote the third and avowed final chapter of the Marvel Comics franchise, Hugh Jackman fluttered the hearts of Logan/Wolverine groupies everywhere by mentioning a spin-off for his rebel with adamantium claws. Clever move, that: With one throwaway comment, the star generated headlines with little more than a wink. More graceful still, he drew attention away from the diminished artistic returns of X-Men: The Last Stand, a brute-force enterprise that doesn't distinguish between cramming entertainment down our gullets like fast food (i.e., undifferentiated action, humor aimed at crotch level) and offering a good meal. And I report this both as a fan of the first two and a staunch supporter of mutant rights, especially when applied to Hugh Jackman.

Certainly something dismaying has happened in the three years since Wolverine, Storm, Rogue, Cyclops, et al. fought back so heroically against discrimination, governmental invasion of privacy, and the hated Mutant Registration Act in X2: X-Men United. Because while filmmaker Bryan Singer's exciting 2003 follow-up to his own notable 2000 launch of the comic-book saga demonstrated the surprising power of a sequel when an artist is at work, The Last Stand, directed by Rush Hour industrialist Brett Ratner, exemplifies what can happen when movies are confused with sandwich shops as franchise opportunities: More items on the menu — or in this case, an even greater variety of superheroes with specialty-act powers — is not the same thing as originality of recipe.

To be sure, there's a lot on the shared plate of Jackman's Wolverine, Halle Berry's Storm, Ian McKellen's Magneto, Famke Janssen's Jean Grey, Patrick Stewart's Professor Xavier, Anna Paquin's Rogue, and the rest of the irregular regulars at Xavier's School for Gifted Youngsters. For one thing, at the end of X2, Jean was supposedly quite dead. But it spills no secrets to note that she's insistently alive in X3 in the form of her alter ego, the voraciously destructive Phoenix, a woman even more dangerous in her out-of-control telekinetic (and, as the good doctor Freud would point out, sexual) powers than Jean was before. (In anticipation of Phoenix's rise from the ashes, writers Simon Kinberg and Zak Penn offer a charming flashback to an earlier time when the Class 5 mutant was a frightened suburban girl, and Xavier and Magneto were dapper, well-moisturized friends.)

An even bigger headline for the differently abled community, though, is the discovery of an antibody that can ''cure'' mutants and restore them to ''normalcy.'' But what is normal? ''You can't cure being a mutant — there's nothing to cure,'' insists Storm, making the allegorical connections to homosexuality about as vivid as a fictional character with the power to control the weather can, short of taping a PSA. Rogue, meanwhile, who complains bitterly that she ''can't touch [her] boyfriend without killing him,'' is an interested potential client; through her, the deaf-community debate about the implications of cochlear implants finds a voice. And as for Magneto the radical separatist (and Holocaust survivor), the government interest in such a homogenizing serum signals nothing less than a coming pogrom. ''They want to exterminate us!'' he declares to his followers, rallying his revolutionary forces to subdue all who would advocate tolerance and multi-culturalism, including Professor Xavier, as well as Henry McCoy — a.k.a. Beast — the charming, rational geneticist with the big head of blue fur, played with modesty, panache, and much peacock- colored prosthetic assistance by Kelsey Grammer.

This is interesting stuff. So why does The Last Stand feel driven to dumb itself down, as if embarrassed by its own ideas? There is no time for reflection in this overstuffed sequel — civil war, special effects involving the destruction of the Golden Gate Bridge, volcanic emotions between Jean Grey and Logan, volcanic enmity between Magneto and, well, everyone. And there's no time for character charm in a production that simultaneously X-es out the old and brings on a baby-faced potential ensemble cast for X-Men: The Next Generation, including Hard Candy's compelling Ellen Page as Kitty Pryde (who can phase through solid matter) and a super-buff Ben Foster from Six Feet Under as the winged hunk Angel. There is, though, time for a kick-to-the-groin visual joke, following which Wolverine taunts a foe with ''Grow a pair of those.'' If The Last Stand were more confident, the movie wouldn't need to constantly grab 'em.

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Official X-Men: The Last Stand Review Thread [SPOILERS!]

Postby bastard_robo on Thu May 25, 2006 6:37 pm

I just got done watching X3 at my work (we got a print early today for the midnight release)


My Conclusion..................


IT DOSE NOT SUCK!


Is it as good as X2............


No..........



Is it as good as X1




Yes....... Maybe slightly better.

It carries the feel of the other two films.

Tbere are some minor dialoge issues that i have with some sceens, but other than that, it was good. I'll be watching it again.

I will say this.... Grammer as Beast = Perfect!

Danger Room, Great shit!

Angel isnt in the film enough to really give any opnion on him.


Beast in my opnion is fucking nailed! Think more of the Cartoon beast from the Fox show, but he's all fucking there

We do get "IM THE JUGGERNAUT BITCH!" Which was fucking great.

Mind you i never had a huge problem with Rathner, but he did nail this one.

I just think that like Mori said, that Fox is idiots for wanting to not make any more of these films, as they could keep on going like the fucking energizer bunny.

I recommend seeing the fucker, though i can already tell that there will be alot of people who'll bash the film anyway.
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Postby raasnio on Thu May 25, 2006 6:59 pm

I would recommend everyone watch their X-Men 1 & 2 DVDs before seeing this new entry. I know I have and I'd be interested to hear if any of you have either. In my opinion they are not the films I've seen glowing reviews of on this very site. They're good, but not great. I think Magneto & Mystique were the standouts. Wolverine was cast well, but he gets his ass kicked by everybody.

I most likely won't see X-Men: The Last Stand until Sunday so I have more waiting to do. Still, I look forward to reviewing it myself after I see it.

Oh and I doubt this is the last film. I think it was the last film in a trilogy and before long we'll hear of another one being developed. Certainly if the Wolverine film succeeds they'll be all over this property again.
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Postby MasterWhedon on Thu May 25, 2006 7:07 pm

"X3 is the gayest blockbuster to hit the multiplex since 1997's Batman and Robin..."

So declares Peter Travers in his 2-star review:

Peter Travers, Rolling Stone wrote:Last stand? My ass. Billed as the climax of a trilogy, the third and weakest chapter in the X-Men series is a blatant attempt to prove there is still life in the franchise. And there is: just enough to pull a Star Trek and spawn a Next Generation saga. Hollywood won't kill this golden goose until it stops laying fourteen-carat eggs at the box office. X2, the best in the series, took in $215 million, beating the original by $58 million. And there are many more stories to be mined from the comics that Stan Lee and Jack Kirby started for Marvel forty years ago. Audiences won't let go of that.

Or will they? It's way early in the summer sweeps, but already action flicks are taking a licking. M:i:III and especially Poseidon are barely ticking. X3 is meant to get the jolt junkies back in their seats. Hugh Jackman, the soul of the franchise as Wolverine -- he of the retractable steel claws and the power to regenerate body parts -- teams up with Colossus (Daniel Cudmore), who uses Wolfie as a furry fastball and hurls him into battle. Now that's efficiency.

The "fastball special" is an apt metaphor for the movie. Director Brett Ratner, who came in last minute when X vet Bryan Singer dropped out to helm Superman Returns, throws everything at the screen in the hope that something will stick. What results feels rushed, chaotic and stuffed with more characters than the script takes time to develop. The Ratner touch, exemplified by the wham of Rush Hour, lacks the resonant feeling Singer brought to the mutant heroes of the first two X-Men films. When Ratner tries for feeling, as he did disastrously in The Family Man and After the Sunset, you only feel numb. Coherence is not Ratner's strength; pow is. And when he turns on the juice, notably in a mutant battle to the death staged at Alcatraz, the true X factor kicks in.

The plot, cooked up by Zak Penn (X2) and Simon Kinberg (Mr. and Mrs. Smith), concerns a cure for mutancy invented by Warren Worthington II (Michael Murphy), a tycoon who can't stand the fact that his son, Warren III (a terrific Ben Foster), is growing wings. The film opens with young Warren in the bathroom trying to saw off his pinions so his daddy won't be ashamed. Talk about phallic symbols! X3 is the gayest blockbuster to hit the multiplex since 1997's Batman and Robin, in which George Clooney wore a bat suit with nipples. Since Warren III can't cut off his dick, er, wings, he decides to flaunt it, calling himself Angel and letting his feathery appendage stretch to sixteen feet.

This kind of X-Viagra sits well with Magneto, a militant mutant leader played by the openly Dumbledore Sir Ian McKellen with the same drama-queen bravado he used to liven up The Da Vinci Code. "Nobody is going to cure us -- we are the cure," says Magneto, who is Malcolm X to the Martin Luther King of Patrick Stewart's Professor Charles Xavier, a peacemaker with an open mind about the cure. For Rogue (Anna Paquin), a student at the professor's school for mutants, her "gift" for killing anyone she touches puts a serious crimp in her sex life with Iceman (Shawn Ashmore). Halle Berry is back with a bit more to do as the weathermaking Storm, but she looks bored doing it. Of the newcomers, including Ellen Page as Kitty Pryde, who walks through walls, and Vinnie Jones as Juggernaut, who busts them down, the hardest not to notice is Kelsey Grammer, done up like a giant blue beach ball as Beast, an adviser to the prez on mutant affairs.

You'll notice that some major characters seem to die. But the series cannot be trusted on these matters (stay after the final credits for Exhibit A). Look at Jean Grey (Famke Janssen), who went to her watery grave in X2, only to be reborn here as Phoenix. She's still possessed of the killer bod that has Wolverine howling at the moon but is now gifted with destructive powers that Magneto wants to harness to stop the cure from being manufactured on Alcatraz.

Ratner pulls out all the stops for the climax with Magneto turning the Golden Gate into his personal passageway to Alcatraz, where everything seems to explode at once, including Jean and Wolfie in an orgasmic display of rough sex that nearly saves the movie from its own too-muchness. I said nearly.

We're down to 52% at Rotten Tomatoes.
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Postby AtomicHyperbole on Thu May 25, 2006 7:19 pm

Too Dumbledore too soon?
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Postby wheredidigo111 on Thu May 25, 2006 10:53 pm

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Postby Adam Balm on Thu May 25, 2006 10:57 pm

God, as if we haven't had enough X3 vs. Superman Returns flame wars, now we are going to have ourselves a 'Dumbledore off'.
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Postby swadetheking on Thu May 25, 2006 10:58 pm

Well all this hatred is, is a classic case of movie nerd superiority. Too blind by other peoples so called views they cant come up with there own opinions because someone who knows a little about film can make a compelling argument as to why the movie is "supposedly crap" making everyone else think that they are STUPID for liking a good movie!!!(read- Guilty pleasure).
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Postby Adam Balm on Thu May 25, 2006 11:05 pm

swadetheking wrote:Well all this hatred is, is a classic case of movie nerd superiority. Too blind by other peoples so called views they cant come up with there own opinions because someone who knows a little about film can make a compelling argument as to why the movie is "supposedly crap" making everyone else think that they are STUPID for liking a good movie!!!(read- Guilty pleasure).
my 5 cents


I'd just like to point out that the 'cream of the crop' on RT---the big and, one would think usually snobbier, critics---are now rating the movie in at 61%, compared to 55% for the general tally.
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Postby buster00 on Fri May 26, 2006 2:35 am

This might belong in the Official Box Office Thread, but it seems more like X3 news...

A friend just got back from a midnight preview at a cinema showing X3 on three screens. He reports that ALL THREE screens were sold out.

This is gonna be a big weekend for mutants, needless to say...
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Postby RogueScribner on Fri May 26, 2006 2:36 am

I'm using my free movie ticket to see this probably on Wednesday (gotta work, yo). So that way if it does suck, it's not like I spent money for the pleasure. I just wasted 2 hours of my life. :P
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Postby wheredidigo111 on Fri May 26, 2006 2:59 am

buster00 wrote:This might belong in the Official Box Office Thread, but it seems more like X3 news...

A friend just got back from a midnight preview at a cinema showing X3 on three screens. He reports that ALL THREE screens were sold out.

This is gonna be a big weekend for mutants, needless to say...


It's not the first week that makes it a hit or not it the other week that will tell if it'll make a good movie. But look I'v been in other forum and what the others are saying is that it's disappointing. This week may look good but the other week don't.
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Postby buster00 on Fri May 26, 2006 3:26 am

wheredidigo111 wrote:
buster00 wrote:This might belong in the Official Box Office Thread, but it seems more like X3 news...

A friend just got back from a midnight preview at a cinema showing X3 on three screens. He reports that ALL THREE screens were sold out.

This is gonna be a big weekend for mutants, needless to say...


It's not the first week that makes it a hit or not it the other week that will tell if it'll make a good movie. But look I'v been in other forum and what the others are saying is that it's disappointing. This week may look good but the other week don't.


Agreed. By the time Superman Returns drops, X3 (and DaVinci, for that matter) will have pretty much taken its tally and hiked home until the time comes (probably right around X-Mas) to trot out the home version. Oh, and then the Special Edition. Oh, and then a box set with all three X-flicks. Oh, and then a Special Edition box set.

Where did you go?
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Postby AtomicHyperbole on Fri May 26, 2006 3:27 am

RogueScribner wrote:I'm using my free movie ticket to see this probably on Wednesday (gotta work, yo). So that way if it does suck, it's not like I spent money for the pleasure. I just wasted 2 hours of my life. :P


What were you going to do with those other two hours? If it wasn't "get laid" or"go basejumping" then I wouldn't worry. ;)
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