Indiana Jones & The Entirely Satisfactory Conclusion!

[caruso_stalker217]

The opening scene is the opposite of brilliant. We poisoned you, Indy, and now you have to chase all over the place to get the antidote! I felt so sorry for Harrison Ford when I saw this scene in the theater. Spielberg must have been saying "OK, Harrison, you've just been poisoned, so you're getting sicker and sicker and are about to die, but as you get sicker, you do more and more heroic action-hero things! It'll be great!" It was utterly unbelievable. I HATE that opening sequence. The opening of Raiders is the height of believability compared to this (and I LOVE the opening of Raiders!). And then when Ford finally drinks the antidote, it works immediately and everything is just fine again. Blah. I don't buy it for a second. I HATE HATE HATE the opening of Temple. Come on, guys, is this crap the best you can do?

The fact that you're complaining about this tells me you've missed the point of this film entirely.

What, precisely, is the point of this film? Other than to grab more money from Raiders fans?

Don't fall into the trap of defending garbage by saying "But it's MEANT to be garbage! It's OUTSTANDING garbage! It's the best garbage EVAR!" It's garbage - get over it.

I'd say the point of the film is to emulate and pay homage to the old serials, as RAIDERS did. Instead of the globe-trotting Nazi-punching thing, though, we get the forbidden fortress devil-worshipping evil ritual stuff. I think it's very well-made and does exactly what it sets out to do. Some people find it annoying and don't like it, I understand. But I don't look at this film and see a cash grab. And I definitely don't think it's garbage or is meant to be or should be excused for being that.

I don't much care for THE LAST CRUSADE, but I wouldn't call it garbage either. Boring, yes. Garbage, no.

CRYSTAL SKULL is another story.

[minstrel]

He said similar things about The Lost World. And that was a better film than Jurassic Park.

Your credibility score has just hit negative numbers. You are now sentenced to defend this statement with facts and evidence, if any exist, until such time as you regain credibility or you are dead.

Haha. OK, 5 points where Jurassic Park is Poo and The Lost World is wonderful..

Jurassic Park has only 2 real good bits. The T Rex attacking the car and The Velociraptors chasing the kids.
The Lost World has many memorable action scenes.

Which you don't mention, so you don't remember them?

JP has no visual style it's bland. Use a freaking coloured lens filter or something, Steven!
The Lost World is dark, has atmosphere.

Wow. We're only at the second point, and you're already complaining about lens filters? Scraping the bottom of the barrel already!

JP hasn't many themes.
JP talks about being God for a while, then it's just about getting the power turned on and getting a chopper home.
The Lost World is about actually us being the real monsters to the Dinos and mistreating them. It's a tree/Dino hugging movie and all the better for it.

I've never been much of a fan of Crichton's endless humanity-is-full-of-hubris and technology-will-bite-us-in-the-ass theme. He has to make his characters insanely stupid to justify that, and as an engineer, I don't appreciate the implied insult. I won't defend either movie over "theme". But I sure don't remember anything about TLW's themes making it superior to JP.

JP has shit characters and acting. SHIT! Sam Neill sees his first Dino - he takes a dump - watch it again! I hate Laura Dern in this. I HATE HER!!!
The Lost World has better, meaner, and more complex performances. I'm talking about Pete Posthelwaite and his crew as well as Jeff, Julianne and soon to be all round studly useless bastard, Vince Vaughn.

I beg to differ here. Sam Neill played a good hero. Laura Dern was decent. Goldblum was Goldblum - I like him, but what do you expect? And Richard Attenborough was much better in JP. And I thought the kids did a terrific job - Spielberg is famous for getting great performances from kids, which is one of the reasons I find Short Round so annoying in Temple. JP also had Samuel L. Jackson and Wayne Knight. Who, exactly, was memorable in TLW? Besides Postlethwaite, I can't remember anyone.

JP has fuck all story. Again, turn the power on, avoid the monsters.

That's fine. Getting the power on and avoiding the monsters is plenty of plot for a well-written, well-directed movie.

The Lost World is about men fighting men over the Dinos, conservation for the Dinos, and avoiding the chaos that will follow if the whole world sees and discovers these creatures.

This is pretty abstract. How is this better than JP's story?

[caruso_stalker217]

I'm afraid I'm gonna have to side with Kirks on this one. THE LOST WORLD pretty much beats JURASSIC PARK, hands down. And then they let the T-Rex loose in San Diego and then... not so much.

Ugh. There are no compelling characters in The Lost World. Maybe Pete Postlethwaite, but that's it. The problem with The Lost World is that it doesn't focus on characters. People just float in and out of scenes almost as it they're props, just for the dinosaurs to menace. In JP, there were real characters I cared about, and the movie stayed focused on them, so that when they were in danger I felt an adrenaline rush. I didn't give a crap about anybody in TLW, so I snoozed through it. And when the T-Rex arrived in San Diego, I laughed. Are we supposed to be emotionally involved with this family we've never met before this one scene? Are we supposed to care about characters that haven't been introduced before?

TLW is poor storytelling. It's utterly forgettable. I'm amazed that there are people here defending it.

These days it just seems I'd rather watch LOST WORLD over JURASSIC PARK. And that might be for Pete Postlethwaite alone.

[The Vicar]

Pete Postlethwaite was a good reason to watch almost anything.

[minstrel]

Pete Postlethwaite was a good reason to watch almost anything.

No argument there.

[Ribbons]

I know, I know, this is a couple weeks late, but here's a Christmas song for the Indiana Jones fan in your life: