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New Madonna Video

PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2005 9:30 am
by vicious_bastard
Anyone seen it? Just got it in at work - every time I think her looks are on the slide the old bird pulls one out of the bag. I have been arguing with the crowd of gawkers behind me about whether she has either a CG ass in the video, or an ass-double with a CG head. How much time must she spend working out?

Either way, it's ass-goodness all round. Dunno about that Abba sample - more millions in the bank for them.

PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2005 9:51 am
by ZombieZoneSolutions
i haven't seen the video yet, but i think your ass-double CGI hypothesis is probably true.

plus, she has a phalanx of expenisve weight trainers.

plus she has had extensive plastic surgery.

plus she made a deal with the devil...

PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2005 9:52 am
by WinslowLeach
Image

PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2005 9:54 am
by vicious_bastard
ZombieZoneSolutions wrote:plus she made a deal with the devil...


She must have sold him her (ass)soul.

PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2005 10:10 am
by burlivesleftnut
Haven't seen the vid, but the song is fucking bad ass.

PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2005 10:29 am
by ZombieZoneSolutions
i have a pavlovian response to any olde skool madonna.

i'm talking like "burning up (for your love)" or "lucky star" or "like a virgin". whenever i hear them i start feeling all sexy and i want to touch my lady friend, or like, any lady that's nearby and drunk enough for a throw down of beergoggling proportions.

yeah, many an awkward morning after 80s night at the local watering hole / meat market.

PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2005 10:32 am
by burlivesleftnut
Yeah when I hear it I have a similar response except replace everything you said after "I start feeling all sexy and..." and replace it with "I put on fishnet stockings, dance like I am putting on a nice good pussy show and kill nuns with razors that fly out of my twat." Not that I have a twat.

PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2005 10:34 am
by ZombieZoneSolutions
vicious_bastard wrote:
ZombieZoneSolutions wrote:plus she made a deal with the devil...


She must have sold him her (ass)soul.


definately!

btw, "(ass)soul" would be a great name for a post-punk free jazz noise funk disco band. cause it's about ass-shaking and soul, but semantically it retains a "fuck you" element (that would be the noise/punk/free jazz vibe).

say "(ass)soul" 3 times fast! what does it sound like?

PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2005 10:35 am
by ZombieZoneSolutions
burlivesleftnut wrote:Yeah when I hear it I have a similar response except replace everything you said after "I start feeling all sexy and..." and replace it with "I put on fishnet stockings, dance like I am putting on a nice good pussy show and kill nuns with razors that fly out of my twat." Not that I have a twat.


IPAMPILASH!!! :lol: :twisted:

PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2005 11:51 am
by John-Locke
burlivesleftnut wrote:Yeah when I hear it I have a similar response except replace everything you said after "I start feeling all sexy and..." and replace it with "I put on fishnet stockings, dance like I am putting on a nice good pussy show and kill nuns with razors that fly out of my twat." Not that I have a twat.


Great to have you back Burly, it's shit like this that make the Zone a special place.

PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2005 12:33 pm
by Colin
You can view it here. That's another one for the spank bank for sure.



Yeah...ride that boombox...yeah...

PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2005 12:42 pm
by DinoDeLaurentiis
Best... sig pic.... EVER!

PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2005 1:07 pm
by burlivesleftnut
Colin wrote:You can view it here. That's another one for the spank bank for sure.



Yeah...ride that boombox...yeah...


Argh, I hate the MTV site!

PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2005 1:17 pm
by ThisIsTheGirl
DinoDeLaurentiis wrote:Best... sig pic.... EVER!


I second that emotion! (But don't forget who wrote the best post ever, old man, or I swear I'll........)


I have a love-hate relationship with Madge. I mean, Deeper and Deeper is one of my favourite house tunes EVER, and there would be at least 8 other of her tunes in my all-time top 100, but then she goes and does stuff like the Motorola advert I saw last night, where she's squeezed into a phone booth with a load of other singers, then Biggie Smalls comes towards the booth and she screams - I see that and I think "what happened to you, Madge? You must have been one of my first ever Objects of Lust, and now you're reduced to this"

I blame Guy Ritchie, or possibly Herc.


On a side note - I don't know why she's bothered about Biggie coming into the booth: he's probably a lot thinner these days.....

PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2005 1:39 pm
by ZombieZoneSolutions
DinoDeLaurentiis wrote:Best... sig pic.... EVER!


i third that emotion!

i got it baad got it baad got it baad, i'm hot for teacher!!! YOWZA!!!

PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2005 1:44 pm
by ZombieZoneSolutions
burlivesleftnut wrote:Argh, I hate the MTV site!


perhaps someday, in some far flung utopian future, some brilliant mastermind will explain to MTV (and the world) that Windows Media Player TOTALLY FUCKING SUCKS. it doesn't work right and the pciture always looks like crap.

Quicktime baby, Quicktime.

PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2005 2:44 pm
by DinoDeLaurentiis
ZombieZoneSolutions wrote:i third that emotion!

i got it baad got it baad got it baad, i'm hot for teacher!!! YOWZA!!!


I like a how a the one kid, he's alla nervous anna hunched up... like a the ball of a the raging hormones... alla you putzes remember what it was a like to be 14, eh? Anna the other kid, he's got his a hand onna her foot anna he's totally serene anna looking ahead, almost a like inna the trance, eh?

PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2005 4:34 pm
by vicious_bastard
DinoDeLaurentiis wrote:Anna the other kid, he's got his a hand onna her foot anna he's totally serene anna looking ahead, almost a like inna the trance, eh?


He's probably concentrating every ounce of strength on keeping 'the wolf from the door' and who can blame the little shit!

PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2005 4:39 pm
by ZombieZoneSolutions
DinoDeLaurentiis wrote:
ZombieZoneSolutions wrote:i third that emotion!

i got it baad got it baad got it baad, i'm hot for teacher!!! YOWZA!!!


I like a how a the one kid, he's alla nervous anna hunched up... like a the ball of a the raging hormones... alla you putzes remember what it was a like to be 14, eh? Anna the other kid, he's got his a hand onna her foot anna he's totally serene anna looking ahead, almost a like inna the trance, eh?


oh man, totally! it's a perfect incapsulation of that painfully awkward time between realizing that your thing-thing is used for more than going to the bathroom, and actually being able to use that thing-thing on, say, your ridiculously hot teacher (or the super cute girl with the pink hair sitting next to you).

then you get to make out with the cute girl with the pink hair but it doesn't go to the place you want it too. oh! the pain!

then, eventually, you convince the cute girl with the pink hair (now blue) to go along with your plans and it's like the best 3 seconds of your entire life...

after that, yer hooked! and its all down hill from there! spend the rest of your life trying to get back to that feeling the first time...

btw i like the werid sexualized cthulian looking drawings hovering in the background too.

what comic is this from anyway?

PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2005 4:47 pm
by Ribbons
ZombieZoneSolutions wrote:...then you get to make out with the cute girl with the pink hair but it doesn't go to the place you want it too. oh! the pain!

then, eventually, you convince the cute girl with the pink hair (now blue) to go along with your plans and it's like the best 3 seconds of your entire life...

after that, yer hooked! and it's all down hill from there! spend the rest of your life trying to get back to that feeling the first time...


Well there's always Lacuna Inc. for that fresh start, Joel...

PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2005 4:50 pm
by burlivesleftnut
wtf

Image

PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2005 4:53 pm
by Ribbons
ZombieZoneSolutions wrote:btw i like the werid sexualized cthulian looking drawings hovering in the background too.

what comic is this from anyway?


The art is by James Jean. I don't know if it's from anything else, but according to his website he did the illustration for a Men's Health mag.

Check out the link, Zombie. If you liked that drawring you'll probably dig on most of his other stuff.

PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2005 6:15 pm
by ZombieZoneSolutions
Ribbons wrote:
ZombieZoneSolutions wrote:btw i like the werid sexualized cthulian looking drawings hovering in the background too.

what comic is this from anyway?


The art is by James Jean. I don't know if it's from anything else, but according to his website he did the illustration for a Men's Health mag.

Check out the link, Zombie. If you liked that drawring you'll probably dig on most of his other stuff.


thanks for the link!

(nice Eternal Sunshine reference too!)

PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2005 6:17 pm
by ZombieZoneSolutions
burlivesleftnut wrote:wtf

Image


how come she looks older there then she does now?

oh, right, plastic surgery / deal with the devil...

i'll say one thing, though, that girl sure has a lot of Blonde Ambition. strike a pose! etc.

PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2005 7:03 pm
by DennisMM
Okay --

1. Madonna has pissed me off again. Recently she said she regrets having used her sexuality to promote her career. She has told the press she shields her children from most media because of the violence and sex. Yet, she does this video.

2. I really like the use of le parkour towards the start.

3. I do NOT dance, but were I in a club and this started playing, I'd be doing the "stupid white boy" for five minutes.

PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2005 7:57 pm
by ZombieZoneSolutions
DennisMM wrote:1. Madonna has pissed me off again. Recently she said she regrets having used her sexuality to promote her career. She has told the press she shields her children from most media because of the violence and sex. Yet, she does this video..


oh man, that's HILARIOUS! she wouldn't even have a career if it wasn't for her sex appeal. it's certainly not for her ahem "singing".

and all the music is made by other people. her sole contribution, then, is her sex appeal. she knows it, too, shes just being a prude...

PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2005 10:35 pm
by Eric G
Shitty song.....and if that's actually Madonna's body, I'd say she's done the good old Botox (sp?) on the ass.....Asstox? Yeah....

PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2005 10:41 pm
by ZombieZoneSolutions
Eric G wrote:Shitty song.....and if that's actually Madonna's body, I'd say she's done the good old Botox (sp?) on the ass.....Asstox? Yeah....


Asstox -- another great potential band name... i'm thinking something grindcore with a pinch of Merzbow.

PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2005 10:41 pm
by Brocktune
Eric G wrote:Shitty song.....and if that's actually Madonna's body, I'd say she's done the good old Botox (sp?) on the ass.....Asstox? Yeah....


how about Butt-ox?

PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2005 10:48 pm
by ZombieZoneSolutions
Brocktune wrote:
Eric G wrote:Shitty song.....and if that's actually Madonna's body, I'd say she's done the good old Botox (sp?) on the ass.....Asstox? Yeah....


how about Butt-ox?


ha ha! poifect!

PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2005 11:03 pm
by Brocktune
ZombieZoneSolutions wrote:Asstox -- another great potential band name... i'm thinking something grindcore with a pinch of Merzbow.



merzbow?!?!

patton?
zorn?
bungle?
perhaps?

PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2005 11:04 pm
by Eric G
Brocktune wrote:
Eric G wrote:Shitty song.....and if that's actually Madonna's body, I'd say she's done the good old Botox (sp?) on the ass.....Asstox? Yeah....


how about Butt-ox?


Genius.

PostPosted: Fri Nov 04, 2005 9:19 pm
by bluebottle
for those who couldn't get the above link to work, try this one.

She looks weird... Her face looks soft. Fragile.

She's getting a little creepy looking, especially when she's in jeans and the hoody walking down the "urban" street.

she's entering her "Cher on the Battleship" faze.

PostPosted: Fri Nov 04, 2005 9:34 pm
by DinoDeLaurentiis
Bluebottle wrote:she's entering her "Cher on the Battleship" faze.


That's a like a the jailbait to a the Dino, eh?

PostPosted: Fri Nov 04, 2005 9:39 pm
by vicious_bastard
I'm pretty sure Cher's son was in her band for that video - a whole days shoot spent surrounded by sailors, staring at your mom's crack. Fun.

PostPosted: Fri Nov 04, 2005 9:42 pm
by bluebottle
DinoDeLaurentiis wrote:
Bluebottle wrote:she's entering her "Cher on the Battleship" faze.


That's a like a the jailbait to a the Dino, eh?


HAHAHAHAH.

Hey, I'm not saying she's not hot, i'm just saying something's not right.

PostPosted: Sat Nov 05, 2005 12:08 am
by burlivesleftnut
Thanks for the link, blue. Madonna looks great, but that has to be her worst video ever.

PostPosted: Sun Nov 06, 2005 7:11 pm
by DennisMM
vicious_bastard wrote:I'm pretty sure Cher's son was in her band for that video - a whole days shoot spent surrounded by sailors, staring at your mom's crack. Fun.


He was. Elijah Blue was playing rhythm guitar, if memory serves, or third guitar -- who knows when you've got a big group going. He's the young, blond guy with whom Cher bumps hips/butts towards the end of the video, as Cher is dressed in her "Hey, sailor! You can almost see my clit!" outfit.

PostPosted: Sun Nov 06, 2005 7:42 pm
by vicious_bastard
Haha. Thought so. Good way of drawing attention from the face.

PostPosted: Sun Nov 06, 2005 7:50 pm
by TonyWilson
Ah she looks the business, and she has looked hotter the older she's got IMHO, but her best album has to be Frozen ( or whetever it's called) The Kruder and Drfmeister remix for Nothing Really Matter is worth her entire career alone. I HATE the abba sample, but like Dennis says I'd still be the idiot whiteboy dancer for 5 minutes

PostPosted: Wed Nov 16, 2005 7:52 pm
by docfalken
Pilates bitches.

Dat ass has Gunnar written all over it!!


I'm enjoying this new Madonna album actually. I've been grooving all day. Woo hoo.

PostPosted: Wed Nov 16, 2005 7:53 pm
by docfalken
I hated the Abba sample too, but damn if it doesn't grow on you. And when you crank out the "Gimme Gimme Gimme" original, I'm sad to say the new mix really blows the power of it away.

PostPosted: Wed Nov 16, 2005 8:01 pm
by Cpt Kirks 2pay
I think that Abba sample fucking sucks. Bad idea, bad idea, I know Madonna that you're trying to be different, but then again, you were trying to be different with your Die.... A-nother..... Day song.

Also her body looks like a sack of potatoes in that leotard.

Personally that song gets on my bloody tits. First hearing it on that crappy Motorola commercial don't help it get off to a good start too.

Personally I never really liked her, apart from her Ray of Light days, but that Light has well burned out.

I'd rather have Shania Twain, and f*ck her brains out. If I was gonna marry anyone (that was an older singer against Atomic Kitten) it would have been her! It would have been her!

PostPosted: Wed Nov 16, 2005 8:18 pm
by Brocktune
Cpt Kirks 2pay wrote:Also her body looks like a sack of potatoes in that leotard.


burlap and dirt dont usually do it for me, but thats one sack of potatos that wouldnt be the same by the time i was done with it.

PostPosted: Wed Nov 16, 2005 8:36 pm
by WinslowLeach
This new Madonna song is actually really catchy. Everytime its on the radio or TV I turn it up. haha.

PostPosted: Wed Nov 16, 2005 11:14 pm
by burlivesleftnut
I am underwhelmed by the album, but there are a few great songs.

PostPosted: Wed Nov 23, 2005 2:32 pm
by thomasgaffney
burlivesleftnut wrote:I am underwhelmed by the album, but there are a few great songs.


I just got listening to the album for the third time. I ususally give cds a few listens before I start to make judgement. I think Hung Up is fantastic and I was really looking forward to Confessions on a Dance Floor. There are about 6 or 7 tracks that I really love. Other than that, I think the rest was a bit of a letdown. Especially after how much American Life grew on me. Still, a lot better than the crap out there.