DVDs with several rated versions

[Ribbons]

as soon as they start making adult versions of kids movies, adding tits and ass and f-bombs, then i say go ahead and make kids versions of adult movies by taking out the tits and ass and f-bombs. don't mess with my Kill Bill and i won't mess with your Princess Diaries. fair enough?

Heheh... this from a the guy who post a the pics of a his teenage daughter onna the Interweb, eh?

Hello? Parent Living inna FantasyLand Phone? She's a for you, eh?

I don't really want to bring attention back to this little exchange because of what went down in its wake, but I don't get what this is even supposed to mean.

[DennisMM]

When my wife and I went to King Kong a couple had a toddler and a baby in a stroller. They should have been liquidated on sight.

[Seppuku]

as soon as they start making adult versions of kids movies, adding tits and ass and f-bombs, then i say go ahead and make kids versions of adult movies by taking out the tits and ass and f-bombs. don't mess with my Kill Bill and i won't mess with your Princess Diaries. fair enough?

Heheh... this from a the guy who post a the pics of a his teenage daughter onna the Interweb, eh?

Hello? Parent Living inna FantasyLand Phone? She's a for you, eh?

I don't really want to bring attention back to this little exchange because of what went down in its wake, but I don't get what this is even supposed to mean.

Dino's saying you can't control who sees/reads anything on the web, and I'm certain that there's all shades of sick fucks online. That's why he thinks it's pretty irresponsible, and though I think that the actual photos they were talking about are kind of harmless, I can definitely see his point.

[Ribbons]

I can see that Dino's saying that you can't control what people see on the Internet and if you want to protect your children you shouldn't post the pictures, but I don't get how that contradicts what Peven said. Like, I don't get the relationship between those two comments.

[TonyWilson]

For a five-year-old, Scorcho, that fight was some nasty shit, as was some of X2 and some of Batman Begins. PG-13 didn't used to look so rough. I was there when Red Dawn got the first PG-13 rating, and I remember what PG-13 used to look like.

And yes, PG-13 has gotten way more intense the last 10 years.

That's a good point to raise Scorch, as the belief that you can only make the BIG money with PG13 rated movies has increased obviously the lack of R rated stuff has gone down, what's interesting is that the studios try to get away with much much harder stuff in a PG13 now because they want the family friendly film to appeal to the action/violence junkies just as much.
It's a fucked up situation that in the hope to make as much money as possible they are screwing up the rating system and exposing younger children to unsuitable images.

[Seppuku]

Oh...well, reading through that little exchange again, I guess it's just the Greek climate is finally gettin' to Dino's over-cooked chestnut.

Back on topic though, I'd hate to see a movie I shot (not that that's my thing) cut into pieces, because you just know that the desecrated version will be the popular cut sold in all stores, making the original version kitsch 'n' cultified.

[thomasgaffney]

Back on topic though, I'd hate to see a movie I shot (not that that's my thing) cut into pieces, because you just know that the desecrated version will be the popular cut sold in all stores, making the original version kitsch 'n' cultified.

If I made a hard R movie that was totally my vision, but the studio wanted to cut it down so that it could be aired on tv, I would have no problem with that. It gives your movie wider exposure to an audience that might not have ever seen your film. And when they get older, they might be more inclined to hunt down and watch the R version to see my movie as it was intended to be seen.

[Pacino86845]

Guys, drop it, let's not beat a dead horse, shall we? If you have questions PM the involved parties. It was a misunderstanding, and hopefully the air's been cleared now. Thanks duders, evil Emperor mod out.

[bluebottle]

Back on topic though, I'd hate to see a movie I shot (not that that's my thing) cut into pieces, because you just know that the desecrated version will be the popular cut sold in all stores, making the original version kitsch 'n' cultified.

If I made a hard R movie that was totally my vision, but the studio wanted to cut it down so that it could be aired on tv, I would have no problem with that. It gives your movie wider exposure to an audience that might not have ever seen your film. And when they get older, they might be more inclined to hunt down and watch the R version to see my movie as it was intended to be seen.

...and then they'd feel ripped off when saw the scene where Tom Hulce is making out with the girl and her bra comes off and it's stuffed with toilet paper and the angel and the devil appear on his shoulders telling him to "Fuck her brains out!!!"

scarred for life.

[burlivesleftnut]

LOS ANGELES—Working with evangelical Christian organizations such as Focus on the Family, the Motion Picture Association of America has developed a movie-rating system based on the laws of the Old Testament. "There was some concern that our existing system was neither strict nor specific enought," MPAA President Dan Glickman said. "Hence, such improved ratings as B-M21 [Blasphemy Only To Be Viewed By Males Over 21] for Finding Nemo, as it was only given to Adam to name the animals." The new ratings system will be instituted around Easter, at which time all producers of movies formerly rated NC-17 will be burned at the stake, their fields sown with salt, and their names cursed unto the ninth generation.

[havocSchultz]

LOS ANGELES—Working with evangelical Christian organizations such as Focus on the Family, the Motion Picture Association of America has developed a movie-rating system based on the laws of the Old Testament. "There was some concern that our existing system was neither strict nor specific enought," MPAA President Dan Glickman said. "Hence, such improved ratings as B-M21 [Blasphemy Only To Be Viewed By Males Over 21] for Finding Nemo, as it was only given to Adam to name the animals." The new ratings system will be instituted around Easter, at which time all producers of movies formerly rated NC-17 will be burned at the stake, their fields sown with salt, and their names cursed unto the ninth generation.

ya - but what would happen to Ang Lee then...?

[Bob Samonkey]

Ang would hang.

[havocSchultz]

see - they should just somehow desgin DVd players to have word replacements - like the Zone - when you say Dumbledore it would turn to Dumbledore - you call somebody a gentleman and you actually call them a gentleman - you say mother fucker and it turns to mickey fickey - when somebody speaks like Kirk - automatic subtitles would come up to translate - and everybody would have Gaffney's knees superimposed across their tits... it would work perfect i think...

[TheBaxter]

...but that's the job you signed up for when you decided to become a parent.

These phrases crack me up.
"Why are you forcing your shit on me?"
"Why should I have to suffer because of your kid?"
"Why can't I smoke?" wahhhhh.

See, I didn't sign up for old retards cussing out a clerk at the store in front of, not only my kid, but many other grown ups. The old retard is the jerk, but I gotta pay for it. "Dad, what's a douchebag fuckwad anyway?" greeeeat.

I didn't sign up for 10 teenagers laying on the floor in a clump in the kids section at Barnes and Noble paging through sex position books while 3to10 year olds walk by. These little morons don't have cars, or manners, or true friends, or self-worth or parents that care, or the smarts to look at these books somewhere else. They do have a big mouth though, and a lot of attitude. "I should be able to read the Kama Sutra for Dummies anywhere I want dude!" But I gotta pay for it. "Dad, what kinda magazine is that?" now I gotta re-arrange my big-talk timeline because of 10 lazy mallrats. They can't even put the books back.

I didn't sign up for a night at the restaurant where 5 cackling hens recount their most recent oral conquests in earshot of many. Are we supposed to be impressed? Oh, congrats. You still got it old lady. "Dad, what's a rimjob?" How can I eat my food and hold my hands over the ears simutaneously?

That's the world now. manners? common sense? do unto others? fuck all that. me. me. me. me. me. My disc shelf. my cellphone. my lane.

here's something I posted on the CHUD board 10/16/02:

Here's a tale sure to enrage:

I worked at a Mall music store where you could try before you buy, hence, the store became one big jukebox for the downtrodden and depressed every weekend. The relationship between surly young customer and surly clerk was unhealthy at best. You may have the easiest disposition until you listen to 14 year olds scream BoneThugsinHarmony while wearing headphones torn and stretched across the store. Even the most forgiving soul would begin to seethe. and these teens were mean. Dawn of the Dead meets KIDS. Scary shit.

So we began to card kids to listen to Parental Advisory cds. yes we did.

I've seen the rage of a pre-teen denied access to the NIN cd they already have at home. not pretty. I've seen the result of subpar parenting as kids who've been abandoned at the mall pout and and yell. at me. loudly.

Proud am I? no. We were trying to control foot traffic in the store, more than anything. But I am a believer in treating others as you'd like to be treated. Respect breeds respect. There was no powertripping. I never carded a kid that came up without a ton of attitude. I now know pre-teens are 10% water-90% attitude.

...I just know one day, you will be on the other side, looking at a 13 year old ManicPanic-ed girl calling you a fa ggot during the Christmas rush. That's when Peter Pan dies.

I'm just sayin'. It'd be nice to have a non-attitude version of The Fantastic Four.

Not really sure what point you're trying to make... that editing a few f-words and s-words out of movies is pointless, 'cos your kid is going to hear and see far worse just walking through a bookstore or sitting in a restaurant? then i guess we're in agreement.

otherwise, this seems beside the point, since we were talking about movies that presumably you can control your child's access to, not the rude and obnoxious behaviour of people that can't be avoided. i'll give you this tip though: never ever take your kid to a baseball or football game, because you'll hear stuff there that will chill your bones. hell, even i get offended at some of the stuff i hear when i go to a football game, and i'm pretty fucking hard to offend.

[cinephile2000]

My father was really good about letting me see movies when I got to certain ages. I didn't see a pg-13 movie till I was 11 or twelve and then only after my dad had seen it. I didn't see a R until I was 16. Deep Blue Sea, it was just for the violence. I consider my first R to be Reservoir Dogs. I really believe that is how I will raise my kids. The whole different edit things I totally understand, if a kid is clammoring to go see the mask and the only reason its PG-13 is a couple of curses then by all means they should do another edit. They could booste the price five bucks or so and everyone would be happy.

[El Scorcho]

My father was really good about letting me see movies when I got to certain ages. I didn't see a pg-13 movie till I was 11 or twelve and then only after my dad had seen it. I didn't see a R until I was 16. Deep Blue Sea, it was just for the violence. I consider my first R to be Reservoir Dogs. I really believe that is how I will raise my kids. The whole different edit things I totally understand, if a kid is clammoring to go see the mask and the only reason its PG-13 is a couple of curses then by all means they should do another edit. They could booste the price five bucks or so and everyone would be happy.

That's weird... My first "R" in theatres was also Deep Blue Sea, I think I was 14. My parents were kinda strict until I hit 16/17, and then I pretty much watched whatever the hell I wanted. I will probably do the same with my kids.

[cinephile2000]

I think its a good idea I mean it keeps you from being overly desensitized. I mean you know kids hear stuff at school, this is just taking something that you can control and to this day I think my parents were right about it.

[peterhengl]

There's some stuff I really don't get here:

Why do you think those movies get rated firsthand? They're not called PG-13 (parents should check out the movie for kids younger than 13 first) or R(estricted for the young ones) just for fun. That is supposed to make sense.

Also, I don't see why your kid has to see Die Hard on his fourth birthday. Regardless of whether that's an edited version or not, the movie is NOT made for a kid of that age. There are PLENTY of movies around for young kids (all the Disney stuff, for instance), no need to resort to R-rated movies.

I don't get it why Doc needs edited versions anyway - them little buggers grow up too fast anyway. Watch some Disney stuff instead and have them see "Evil Dead" when they're old enough.

And another argument I don't get is that whole "accidental exposure" thing. First, it is your job as a good parent to make sure your kids only watch stuff on the TV they are supposed to.

Second, if you shouldn't be too over-protective. Your kid won't turn into a crazy necrophile drug dealer just because it overheard a talk about stuff mommy and daddy do at night once - at least if your kid grows up in a positive environment otherwise. And, don't forget: once they reach a certain age (called puberty), they'll stop listening to you anyways.

[bc1970]

Baxter, my rant, ill-placed as it was, referred to the fact that society has become selfish, from the young to the old. Nobody cares about the person next to them, old or young, anymore. There's no sense of decency or tact or common sense. Do I need to be in a bubble for that? I'm bombarded by public stupidity on all sides. No cut off from their brains to the mouths. No line. It's frustrating. To me, this is separate from being an overprotective parent.

I'm not telling anybody to clean up the Takashi Miike catalog so my kids can watch. That's stupid.

Does the FF comic ever curse? Ever? Then why do they need it in the movie? To seem cooler? More real? Why should you have to make a six year old wait to see FF? I'm down with a clean version.

Then I thought the reaction was "Get over it, it'll mess up my favorite movies..." and I overreacted then overposted.

[RogueScribner]

When it comes to profanity, I don't see the big deal over mild uses in PG-rated films. PG = Parental Guidance Suggested, not "This is a Kids Movie!" There will be some things in the movie young kids should probably not be exposed to in the terms of language, violence, nudity, and/or thematic elements.

Once your kids get out into the real world, which typically starts when they start school, they WILL hear this stuff. The point is not to shelter them from it forever, but to mold their behavior into what you feel is acceptable. If you don't ever want to hear them utter that word, then tell them and then punish them if they do. Explain to them about appropriate behavior in certain settings. Kids are smart, they'll learn.

Learning a bad word isn't going to scar anyone for life and I guarantee any 5 or 6 year old has heard some of these words already. I'd be more concerned over the level of violence or sexuality in a film than some mild language used. It's a parent's job to monitor what his children are exposed to. If the use of the s-word is enough for you not to expose your kids to Fantastic Four then that's on you. But I think you give your kids too little credit in knowing what is "right" and "wrong" and how to behave acceptably.

I was exposed to all kinds of movies when I was young. None of the violence, language, or sexuality warped my brain. I was certainly curious about some things that were new or confusing to me, but my dad would explain it and let me know how I should act and why (the why is very important) and I grew up a generally well-behaved kid. I didn't have a huge curiosity about R-rated movies growing up because I'd already seen plenty of them. There was nothing mysterious about this forbidden fruit.

I'm not suggesting you or any other parent start taking your kids to R movies, but I think you should make your judgments on a case by case basis and if you feel something is unsuitable, fine, restrict their viewing of it. You can't raise your kids in a vacuum, though, and the sooner you can ease them into the world with the appropriate support and understanding, the better off they'll be.

As they get older, they'll get their hands on this stuff. If not at your house, then at a friend's house or elsewhere. You might as well prepare to explain this stuff on your terms than "off the street."

[kortanaskew]

My favorite word replacement was "White Man Can't Jump" using "mickey fickey" instead of "mother fucker" on TV.

They used Mickey Fickey in Do The Right Thing too. it was funnier there though cause, they had a Korean guy say it.

Radio Raheem: Give me the Batteries Mickey Fickey!

Korean Grocer: MICKEY FICKEY? MICKEY FICKEY YOU!!!!!!!

My favorite word replacement is from Mallrats.

Jay's "All It took was a Phat Chronic Blut"
was turned into "All it took was a Fast Karate Punch!"

When my wife and I went to King Kong a couple had a toddler and a baby in a stroller. They should have been liquidated on sight

Because of the content of the movie? Or because of the odd chance that baby will cry? As a film goer i hate anything that interrupts the experience sure. But I don't consider a baby cry worse than another person talking or shouting back at a movie screen.
Whats funny is we're immediately biased at parents that we give them dirty looks as they come in. And if a baby makes one sound everyone gets pissed. Even ifs not crying.
A baby's loud coo or giggle is no different then people laughing at the theater. That's they're reaction.

On the other hand as a parent, I do feel for a young couple who's contstantly stuck at home and a movie is an inexpensive day out. Babysitters are fuckign expensive and also hard to come by. You dont leave your child with just about anyone. But take consideration in what films to take your child to. Don't take them to see loud THX blockbusters. The ones filled with Loud sounds and Fast moving images, These scare normal adults. Imagine the effect on young chidlren.
And when they do start to cry, don't try to console them during the movie, Walk em out and take em outside. Then when they're okay come back in. Designate a parent for this duty. And at the next movie switch parents.
For slightly older kids have popcorn and snacks handy, finger foods keep them busy and their mouths full.
Know your children. We cant take my daughter out to anything except animated films. She gets bored and starts to run around.
My son we took to see the Star Wars trilogy re-release and he loved it. He's always been an avid movie goer. He loves the auidence reactions.
Change your theatre. Dont go to the Mall Crowd Filled theater. Find an out of the way strip mall one that has little or no patrons. No complaints will come if your kid is running up and down the aisles, if theres no one else in there.


Also for the Guy that Started This Thread who wants EDITED films check this website out.

http://cleanfilms.com/

They rent out edited versions of films to watch with your family.
And sell them too.


And as for whether or not things are getting too P.C. in the world today.
Think about this.

E.T. The Extra-terrestrial is considered to be a great family film. Along
with Star Wars it is one of the highest grossing family films of all time.

And not one of us would hesitate watchign that film with our kids, parents, grandparents.

But I leave you with this sample bit of dialogue

Mary: All we're trying to say is, maybe you just probably imagined it.
Elliot: I couldn't have imagined it!
Michael: Maybe it was a pervert or a deformed kid or something.
Gertie: A deformed kid.
Michael: Maybe an elf or a leprechaun?
Elliot: It was nothing like that, penis-breath!

[The Vicar]

When Die Hard III was on network telly, they had Samuel L Jackson saying "melon farmer" instead of, well, you know.

Unintentionally hi-larious.

[Flickerhead]

I take artistic integrity very seriously, but the idea that we can't edit films because of the "director's vision" is kinda silly. Maybe one film out of 100 actually represents the director's vision. Most are made by committee despite the "film by" credit, and as has already been pointed out, most films get the chop for television and whatnot.

It seems crazy to me that studios haven't gotten hip to the fact that they could probably sell twice as many DVDs if they made "family friendly" versions of R-rated and PG-13 rated hits. My parents, for example, love movies and would purchase a lot more than they do if such versions were available. They have standards that they just won't violate, regardless of how badly they want to see the film. It's a good idea, and the "director's cut" or "theatrical version" will always be there for people who want the original in all its glory.

Beside, we've already got a hundred different versions of "Star Wars" and "Blade Runner" and "Apocalypse Now," and that hasn't tarnished the originals, eh?

[Bob Samonkey]

I always thought it would be a great idea to have the edited for tv track on all movies. Like they used to do it back in the day and replaced the bad words with nonsensical words.

Yipi kiay mother lover.

He is so full of shoot.

I am getting to old for this stuff.

It would be great.

Ok just to illustrate my point as to how great this would be I give you a TV edit of the Big Lebowski

Here

Why would the man in the alps be so angry about you finding him?

And Stoners must really NOT like scrambled eggs...

[tapehead]

Poor Larry would just be so scared and confused.

... I don't even know how to make scrambled eggs... has this got something to do with my homework in the back of that guy's car?

[Bob Samonkey]

I always thought it would be a great idea to have the edited for tv track on all movies. Like they used to do it back in the day and replaced the bad words with nonsensical words.

Yipi kiay mother lover.

He is so full of shoot.

I am getting to old for this stuff.

It would be great.

Ok just to illustrate my point as to how great this would be I give you a TV edit of the Big Lebowski

Here

Why would the man in the alps be so angry about you finding him?

And Stoners must really NOT like scrambled eggs...

More!

I still think this would be hysterical as a DVD track...

[Fried Gold]

I still think this would be hysterical as a DVD track...

"Joke off" ?

Who's Mr Falcon?


Our ITV used to show a version with mother farker changed to "kemosabe".

[Bob Samonkey]

Who isn't Mr. Falcon...

I cannot find anymore. And I am really looking.

[Eunuch Provocateur]

I don't even care about TV edited versions... I just wish that unrated versions came with the rated versions as well... Like with Anchorman, they changed some of my favorite jokes in the unrated version, but I was unwilling to pay AGAIN for the PG-13 edition.

But TV edit tracks would be pretty cool... If they can give you French dubs and Spanish dubs, why can't they give you the TV dub too?

It'd be nice if movie houses were more inclusive with their DVD packages.