BATTLEFIELD EARTH

New movies! Old movies! B-movies! Discuss discuss discuss!!!

BATTLEFIELD EARTH

Postby King Psyz on Wed Sep 13, 2006 1:58 pm

My god, why do I torture myself with bad film?

What is this movie even about? Is it some kind of Scientologist dogma I'm missing?
King Psyz
PSYZ MATTERS, DO YOU?
 
Posts: 4906
Joined: Fri Dec 09, 2005 10:11 pm
Location: anywhere but here

Postby doglips on Wed Sep 13, 2006 2:00 pm

Come on, Barry Pepper is Badass!

At the very least you must fancy a pair of Travolta's platforms?
User avatar
doglips
MOD FAIRY
 
Posts: 6288
Joined: Sun Sep 25, 2005 6:08 am

Postby MasterWhedon on Wed Sep 13, 2006 2:06 pm

I rented this movie back when to see if it was as bad as they all say. It was worse. Far, far worse.

I love how the laser blasts fire in slow motion.
User avatar
MasterWhedon
KEEPER OF THE PURSE
 
Posts: 9473
Joined: Wed Jul 20, 2005 9:07 pm
Location: Los Angeles

Postby Lady Sheridan on Wed Sep 13, 2006 2:08 pm

I liked how they beamed all the knowledge of the universe into his brain...but he still had to learn to fly manually.

Or at least I remember something like that.

Barry Pepper looked pretty hot in it though. I tried to concentrate on that. I PAID to see it in the theatre.
User avatar
Lady Sheridan
RED
 
Posts: 5035
Joined: Mon Jan 09, 2006 6:09 pm
Location: Croft Manor

Postby doglips on Wed Sep 13, 2006 2:09 pm

Lady Sheridan wrote:I liked how they beamed all the knowledge of the universe into his brain...but he still had to learn to fly manually.


IPAMPILASH!!
User avatar
doglips
MOD FAIRY
 
Posts: 6288
Joined: Sun Sep 25, 2005 6:08 am

Postby MisterCynic on Wed Sep 13, 2006 2:09 pm

are you a scientologist?
Last edited by MisterCynic on Wed Sep 13, 2006 2:09 pm, edited 1 time in total.
MisterCynic
STEAK-A-BABY
 
Posts: 199
Joined: Fri Dec 09, 2005 4:05 am

Postby MasterWhedon on Wed Sep 13, 2006 2:09 pm

Lady Sheridan wrote:I PAID to see it in the theatre.

:shock:

That's the worst kind of evil.
User avatar
MasterWhedon
KEEPER OF THE PURSE
 
Posts: 9473
Joined: Wed Jul 20, 2005 9:07 pm
Location: Los Angeles

Postby Al Shut on Wed Sep 13, 2006 2:10 pm

Lady Sheridan wrote: I PAID to see it in the theatre.


HAHAHAHAHA!!!

Sorry I didn't meant to be cruel.
Note to myself: Fix this image shit!
User avatar
Al Shut
THE LAUGHING ZONER
 
Posts: 6239
Joined: Fri Dec 09, 2005 1:57 pm
Location: Oberhausen, Germany

Postby doglips on Wed Sep 13, 2006 2:11 pm

MasterWhedon wrote:
Lady Sheridan wrote:I PAID to see it in the theatre.

:shock:

That's the worst kind of evil.


So did I, you have to go and see a bad movie every so often.

Cinema sadism can be funny.

I went to see Underworld Evolution on the same principle. I also went to see Armageddon on the same principle. I enjoyed Battlefield more than Bruce.
User avatar
doglips
MOD FAIRY
 
Posts: 6288
Joined: Sun Sep 25, 2005 6:08 am

Postby HollywoodBabylon on Wed Sep 13, 2006 2:13 pm

thedoglippedone wrote:
Cinema sadism can be funny.



Yes, as the movie career of Keanu Reeves proves.
User avatar
HollywoodBabylon
AIRWOLF
 
Posts: 1369
Joined: Sun Jan 29, 2006 3:55 pm

Postby Lady Sheridan on Wed Sep 13, 2006 2:14 pm

I know, I know. I weep for my money. If I could meet Travolta in person, I would ask for it back!

All I can say is that we saw it on opening day before the "this is the worst film ever" buzz had really started. It was still whispers but like Whedon, we thought "How bad could it be?"

I remember people said it was laced with Scientology messages, but I apparently don't know enough about the inner workings of that cabal to have picked up on them.
User avatar
Lady Sheridan
RED
 
Posts: 5035
Joined: Mon Jan 09, 2006 6:09 pm
Location: Croft Manor

Postby The Vicar on Wed Sep 13, 2006 2:14 pm

Al_Shut wrote:
Lady Sheridan wrote: I PAID to see it in the theatre.


HAHAHAHAHA!!!

Sorry I didn't meant to be cruel.


No, this would be the time.

You paid money!!
Real money!
And it all ended up in John Travolta's ass.
.
........................................
Image
User avatar
The Vicar
Fear & Loathing in the Zone
 
Posts: 16179
Joined: Fri Dec 09, 2005 10:21 am

Postby Al Shut on Wed Sep 13, 2006 2:16 pm

But at least it doesn't have zombies waking from point A to B and back for no apparent reason.

I saw Plan 9 from outer space the same day I saw Battlefield Earth and it was worse.
Note to myself: Fix this image shit!
User avatar
Al Shut
THE LAUGHING ZONER
 
Posts: 6239
Joined: Fri Dec 09, 2005 1:57 pm
Location: Oberhausen, Germany

Postby doglips on Wed Sep 13, 2006 2:16 pm

HollywoodBabylon wrote:
thedoglippedo ne wrote:
Cinema sadism can be funny.



Yes, as the movie career of Keanu Reeves proves.


OMG! Take that back. We are talking about Ted Theodore Logan here.
User avatar
doglips
MOD FAIRY
 
Posts: 6288
Joined: Sun Sep 25, 2005 6:08 am

Postby King Psyz on Wed Sep 13, 2006 2:19 pm

Just got to the "education" scene... my god...
King Psyz
PSYZ MATTERS, DO YOU?
 
Posts: 4906
Joined: Fri Dec 09, 2005 10:11 pm
Location: anywhere but here

Postby HollywoodBabylon on Wed Sep 13, 2006 2:21 pm

Having not seen it, is this worth renting out for it's comic-trash value?
Or is it plain bad, as in spend-your-money-on-a-bag-of-crisps-instead?
User avatar
HollywoodBabylon
AIRWOLF
 
Posts: 1369
Joined: Sun Jan 29, 2006 3:55 pm

Postby The Vicar on Wed Sep 13, 2006 2:21 pm

Al_Shut wrote:But at least it doesn't have zombies waking from point A to B and back for no apparent reason.

I saw Plan 9 from outer space the same day I saw Battlefield Earth and it was worse.


Who picked out that twin bill?
At least PLan Nine has some camp charm to it...BE was just big budget Plan Nine Part Deux.

Ed Wood's direction could have saved BE....
( too convulsed with laughter to continue typing....)
.
........................................
Image
User avatar
The Vicar
Fear & Loathing in the Zone
 
Posts: 16179
Joined: Fri Dec 09, 2005 10:21 am

Postby HollywoodBabylon on Wed Sep 13, 2006 2:24 pm

thedoglippedone wrote:
HollywoodBabyl on wrote:
thedoglippedo ne wrote:
Cinema sadism can be funny.



Yes, as the movie career of Keanu Reeves proves.


OMG! Take that back. We are talking about Ted Theodore Logan here.



No, dog, we're talking about the finest actor ever to graduate from The Roger Moore School of Non-Acting :wink:
User avatar
HollywoodBabylon
AIRWOLF
 
Posts: 1369
Joined: Sun Jan 29, 2006 3:55 pm

Postby Al Shut on Wed Sep 13, 2006 2:25 pm

The Vicar wrote:
Al_Shut wrote:But at least it doesn't have zombies waking from point A to B and back for no apparent reason.

I saw Plan 9 from outer space the same day I saw Battlefield Earth and it was worse.


Who picked out that twin bill?
At least PLan Nine has some camp charm to it...BE was just big budget Plan Nine Part Deux.

Ed Wood's direction could have saved BE....
( too convulsed with laughter to continue typing....)



We thought while we're at it we could go all the way. We saw some others that day but they didn't even come close.
Note to myself: Fix this image shit!
User avatar
Al Shut
THE LAUGHING ZONER
 
Posts: 6239
Joined: Fri Dec 09, 2005 1:57 pm
Location: Oberhausen, Germany

Postby The Vicar on Wed Sep 13, 2006 2:27 pm

How could they?
I hope there were liberal amounts of alcohol flowing for this double feature.
.
........................................
Image
User avatar
The Vicar
Fear & Loathing in the Zone
 
Posts: 16179
Joined: Fri Dec 09, 2005 10:21 am

Postby Al Shut on Wed Sep 13, 2006 2:31 pm

Nope it was kind of a test who much we could take, beeing drunk would be cheating. Plus I never drink.
Note to myself: Fix this image shit!
User avatar
Al Shut
THE LAUGHING ZONER
 
Posts: 6239
Joined: Fri Dec 09, 2005 1:57 pm
Location: Oberhausen, Germany

Postby Lady Sheridan on Wed Sep 13, 2006 2:32 pm

HollywoodBabylon wrote:Having not seen it, is this worth renting out for it's comic-trash value?
Or is it plain bad, as in spend-your-money-on-a-bag-of-crisps-instead?


The latter. It would take the likes of Joel (or Mike) and the bots to tackle it and make it funny, mere mortals like us don't stand a chance. :?
User avatar
Lady Sheridan
RED
 
Posts: 5035
Joined: Mon Jan 09, 2006 6:09 pm
Location: Croft Manor

Postby King Psyz on Wed Sep 13, 2006 2:35 pm

Luckily it's on HBO so I'm not directly paying for it...
King Psyz
PSYZ MATTERS, DO YOU?
 
Posts: 4906
Joined: Fri Dec 09, 2005 10:11 pm
Location: anywhere but here

Postby Al Shut on Wed Sep 13, 2006 2:38 pm

King Psyz wrote:Luckily it's on HBO so I'm not directly paying for it...


Except for the small part of your soul that is lost forever.
Note to myself: Fix this image shit!
User avatar
Al Shut
THE LAUGHING ZONER
 
Posts: 6239
Joined: Fri Dec 09, 2005 1:57 pm
Location: Oberhausen, Germany

Postby DennisMM on Wed Sep 13, 2006 2:44 pm

Julia and I paid to see it for camp value. We sat in a largely empty theater, whispering snarky comments back and forth. Was I imagining things, or did the Psychlos' sixth fingers sometimes move, sometimes dangle inertly as an obvious piece of foam and sometimes disappear altogether?

Lady S, calling the evil aliens Psychlos was about as deep as things went into Scientology, as far as I could see. Making evil aliens the villains was part of it, too, but that's awfully basic. The interesting question is why Travolta would want to play one of the evil overlords Scientology exists to destroy. By that time he had more or less specialized in villains, I suppose.
Image
User avatar
DennisMM
NOT PARTICULARLY MENACING
 
Posts: 16813
Joined: Mon Jul 18, 2005 5:02 pm
Location: Watchin' the reels go 'round and 'round

Postby King Psyz on Wed Sep 13, 2006 3:06 pm

What's funny is how travolta's face stayed human and everyone else had weird, ill applied alien makeup pieces.

Here's another tidbit, speaking of Keanu. Anyone notice how a certain slo mo shooting sequence mimics the lobby scene from the first Matrix?
King Psyz
PSYZ MATTERS, DO YOU?
 
Posts: 4906
Joined: Fri Dec 09, 2005 10:11 pm
Location: anywhere but here

Postby MonsieurReynard on Wed Sep 13, 2006 3:08 pm

This and the 2006 Wicker Man are slugging it out for the title of "Worst Film Ever".

Both films fail on all levels, including being unable to understand their own internal logics.

Both feature actors who seem to have no idea what they're doing.

However, The Wicker Man is unintentionally hilarious, whereas this stops even being funny after 20 minutes and is just a stewed lump of turd.
Reynard City is back! Find out what the heck is going on at http://www.ecswebdesign.co.uk/wip/reynardcity/

*Free copy of Issue 1 *Reynard City Stories *An Audience With AK Girl and more...
MonsieurReynard
CHEETS ON HIS WIFE
 
Posts: 330
Joined: Wed Jul 19, 2006 8:49 am
Location: Norwich,UK

Postby AtomicHyperbole on Wed Sep 13, 2006 3:59 pm

I can beat Lady S on this front. I paid to see in in the theatre.

In Italy.

...

In Italian.

Which back then I couldn't speak... :P

Tell you the truth, it was worth it. Best comedy science fiction ever made! I can't fail to love how bad it is. The audience was LAUGHING... the aliens go to the fucking pub to complain about work! It's some kind of evil genius, that's for sure.
Image
User avatar
AtomicHyperbole
AIRWOLF PLUS
 
Posts: 7438
Joined: Sat Feb 25, 2006 7:30 am

Postby DennisMM on Wed Sep 13, 2006 4:07 pm

And who doesn't go to a pub to complain about work? You're denying alien overlords and torturers the same rights you hold dear! You're a divider, not a uniter.
Image
User avatar
DennisMM
NOT PARTICULARLY MENACING
 
Posts: 16813
Joined: Mon Jul 18, 2005 5:02 pm
Location: Watchin' the reels go 'round and 'round

Postby King Psyz on Thu Sep 14, 2006 12:22 pm

So unless this is from some secret scientologist subtext, I'm pretty sure pegging it's failure by being based on their marginalized "religon" was a last ditch effort by the studio to distance themselves from the production.

In hindsight, a feature length movie on the whole Xenu / Thetans thing would have been funnier.
King Psyz
PSYZ MATTERS, DO YOU?
 
Posts: 4906
Joined: Fri Dec 09, 2005 10:11 pm
Location: anywhere but here

Postby AtomicHyperbole on Thu Sep 14, 2006 12:40 pm

The only thing it taught me is to go to the pub and complain about work.
Image
User avatar
AtomicHyperbole
AIRWOLF PLUS
 
Posts: 7438
Joined: Sat Feb 25, 2006 7:30 am

Postby MonsieurReynard on Fri Sep 15, 2006 4:41 am

Did you really need Battlefield Earth to tell you that? There was about six million episodes of Cheers before that!
Reynard City is back! Find out what the heck is going on at http://www.ecswebdesign.co.uk/wip/reynardcity/

*Free copy of Issue 1 *Reynard City Stories *An Audience With AK Girl and more...
MonsieurReynard
CHEETS ON HIS WIFE
 
Posts: 330
Joined: Wed Jul 19, 2006 8:49 am
Location: Norwich,UK


Return to Movie Discussion

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 11 guests