SCIFI Channel "original" movies (ATOMIC TWISTER!)

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SCIFI Channel "original" movies (ATOMIC TWISTER!)

Postby instant_karma on Sat Jul 07, 2007 10:47 pm

Man, I knew that one day I'd probably end up confessing to this in the Zone. I just hoped it would be a little while longer.

I have a weakness for these low budget sci-fi channel monster movies that most of you guys (perhaps rightly) deride. Most of them are made by Nu Image, UFO and more recently The Asylum.

My appreciation of these movies began when I saw what for me is the best 'bad but fun' movie I've ever seen - Shark Attack 3: Megalodon. Some of you may have heard of this movie, as it's picked up something of a cult following over the last couple of years.

Here's a couple of youtube clips that highlight the kind of quality entertainment his flick has to offer-

Best pick-up line in the history of spoken language!

Watch Bulgarian extras get eaten by bad special effects!

Anyway, after the intoxicating high of this film, I've always been on the lookout for my next hit. Nothing has ever come close, but I've had fun sampling the delights of Boa vs Python or Mansquito.

Oh, and just so this isn't a total threadjack, that Oz thing looks interesting...
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Postby darkjedijaina on Sat Jul 07, 2007 10:55 pm

instant_karma wrote:My appreciation of these movies began when I saw what for me is the best 'bad but fun' movie I've ever seen - Shark Attack 3: Megalodon. Some of you may have heard of this movie, as it's picked up something of a cult following over the last couple of years.


HEY!

There's only ONE DJJ, and she does not share power....
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Postby instant_karma on Sun Jul 08, 2007 12:32 am

darkjedijaina wrote:
instant_karma wrote:
My appreciation of these movies began when I saw what for me is the best 'bad but fun' movie I've ever seen - Shark Attack 3: Megalodon. Some of you may have heard of this movie, as it's picked up something of a cult following over the last couple of years.


HEY!

There's only ONE DJJ, and she does not share power....


I do hope you're not trying to claim to be a bigger Shark Attack 3: Megalodon fan.

That would be...unwise...
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Postby darkjedijaina on Sun Jul 08, 2007 2:43 pm

instant_karma wrote:
darkjedijaina wrote:
instant_karma wrote:
My appreciation of these movies began when I saw what for me is the best 'bad but fun' movie I've ever seen - Shark Attack 3: Megalodon. Some of you may have heard of this movie, as it's picked up something of a cult following over the last couple of years.


HEY!

There's only ONE DJJ, and she does not share power....


I do hope you're not trying to claim to be a bigger Shark Attack 3: Megalodon fan.

That would be...unwise...


Um.... do sharks turn you on?

Are you that big of a fan?
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Postby Adam Balm on Sun Jul 08, 2007 3:31 pm

Would anyone be opposed to splitting off the Sci-Fi channel originals convo into its own topic? It sounds like enough people here watch them it deserves its own thread.
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Postby instant_karma on Sun Jul 08, 2007 4:30 pm

darkjedijaina wrote:
instant_karma wrote:
darkjedijaina wrote:
instant_karma wrote:
My appreciation of these movies began when I saw what for me is the best 'bad but fun' movie I've ever seen - Shark Attack 3: Megalodon. Some of you may have heard of this movie, as it's picked up something of a cult following over the last couple of years.


HEY!

There's only ONE DJJ, and she does not share power....


I do hope you're not trying to claim to be a bigger Shark Attack 3: Megalodon fan.

That would be...unwise...


Um.... do sharks turn you on?

Are you that big of a fan?


I just like watching them go crazy and eat entire liferafts.

I'll leave the uh, other stuff, to kirk.

Does make me wonder exactly what kind of 'shark movie' he's working on though...

Adam Balm wrote:Would anyone be opposed to splitting off the Sci-Fi channel originals convo into its own topic? It sounds like enough people here watch them it deserves its own thread.


You mean I can have a whole thread all to myself?

It's not like anyone else is gonna use it...
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Postby darkjedijaina on Sun Jul 08, 2007 4:43 pm

instant_karma wrote:
Adam Balm wrote:Would anyone be opposed to splitting off the Sci-Fi channel originals convo into its own topic? It sounds like enough people here watch them it deserves its own thread.


You mean I can have a whole thread all to myself?

It's not like anyone else is gonna use it...


not true. i'm pretty much in love with the sci fi channel movies.
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Postby Chairman Kaga on Sun Jul 08, 2007 5:36 pm

So far the worst one I have seen was the recent Stan Lee Harpies starring that one bottom rung Baldwin brother. It even makes Shark Attack 3 look competent. Personally I love Mansquito because it has a fantastic title and features a great scene of Parker Lewis addressing the Manquito as "Mansquito" as if the monster would know this....Classic stuff.
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Postby darkjedijaina on Sun Jul 08, 2007 5:42 pm

Chairman Kaga wrote:So far the worst one I have seen was the recent Stan Lee Harpies starring that one bottom rung Baldwin brother.



ohhh, i haven't caught that one yet. josh becker directed it.

he also did Alien Apocalypse with Bruce Campbell. Mmmmm.
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Postby darkjedijaina on Sat Jul 14, 2007 11:04 pm

zomgz, i think i just saw the most awful sci-fi original movie ever. Supergator. I mean.... I knew from the title that it would be a rip-off of Lake Placid... not to mention the Lake Placid 2 sci-fi original that aired not long ago. Perhaps that movie did well, and that's why they decided to continue the 'gator' saga?

It did have humorous moments in it, though. I always enjoy watching people get eaten.
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Postby instant_karma on Sat Jul 14, 2007 11:11 pm

darkjedijaina wrote:zomgz, i think i just saw the most awful sci-fi original movie ever. Supergator. I mean.... I knew from the title that it would be a rip-off of Lake Placid... not to mention the Lake Placid 2 sci-fi original that aired not long ago. Perhaps that movie did well, and that's why they decided to continue the 'gator' saga?

It did have humorous moments in it, though. I always enjoy watching people get eaten.


It couldn't have been any worse than Tobe Hooper's Crocodile could it? He actually managed to make a giant crocodile eating teenagers boring.

I thought Lake Placid 2 was okay, but it didn't have the ace in the hole of the original movie, which was Betty White saying "officer cocksucker".
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Postby Adam Balm on Sat Jul 14, 2007 11:13 pm

Yeah, I'm now watching these things every week. The funniest thing about this movie was that they actually ran an interview with one of the actors at SCI-FI wire to promote it. If I was them I'd be trying to keep this movie as much of a secret as possible. So that was pretty much the only entertaining thing about the movie.

Anyway...

THE GOOD:

The portrayal of the vulcanologists wasn't too bad. They actually went farther than most in trying to respectfully portray scientists. The design of the supergator wasn't too bad, even though it looked like it was rendered in 3d studio max. And I love how everyone would conveniently fall behind a bush or an outhouse or a big easter island head when they're attacked, because they didn't have the budget to show it.

THE BAD:

The constant homages to Jaws. It wasn't bad enough that they named their boat the Orca and they had a made-in-hong-kong version of Quint, but the fact that they had to kill the monster by shooting a compressed air/propane tank and it up...fuck. There's homages and then there's distractions.

But the good news is that next week is ATOMIC TWISTER! Who's up for that? Anyone? Beuller?
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Postby instant_karma on Sat Jul 14, 2007 11:34 pm

A 3.8 rating on imdb and Corbin Bernsen is in the cast.

Soundsl like a must see...
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Postby Adam Balm on Sat Jul 14, 2007 11:36 pm

Yay! We're going to totally make this a weekly thing.
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SCIFI Channel "original" movies (SUPERGATOR!)

Postby bastard_robo on Sun Jul 15, 2007 12:40 am

Isnt Supergator the same as DINOCROC?
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Postby Adam Balm on Sun Jul 15, 2007 12:43 am

Holy shit, if aint bad enough they were ripping off Lake Placid (and subsequently SCI-FI's own Lake Placid 2) they're also ripping off themselves from three years ago. "Original" indeed.
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SCIFI Channel "original" movies (SUPERGATOR!)

Postby bastard_robo on Sat Jul 21, 2007 9:43 am

Dont forget, We get ATOMIC TWISTER tomarrow!
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Postby Adam Balm on Sat Jul 21, 2007 12:06 pm

Indeed!

9/8 central tonight! Who's going to watch with us?
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Postby darkjedijaina on Sat Jul 21, 2007 11:47 pm

i watched it, and talked in a chinese voice the whole time, laughing at the silliness of the peoples.

though, actually, it was pretty decent for a sci-fi movie.

and now, TORNADO! is on, with the lovely bruce campbell. and ernie hudson.

yay.
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Postby instant_karma on Sun Jul 22, 2007 12:04 am

Will be watching Atomic Twister very soon.

Will report back then.
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Postby stereosforgeeks on Sun Jul 22, 2007 12:06 am

instant_karma wrote:Will be watching Atomic Twister very soon.

Will report back then.


Why ohh why!?!

I worked at a nuke plant for 3 yrs. It is the most improbable movie ever.
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Postby Adam Balm on Sun Jul 22, 2007 12:35 am

After watching this movie, I can think of two things wrong with that title...
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Postby wonkabar on Sun Jul 22, 2007 12:36 am

Is an atomic twister in any way related to an atomic sit-up?
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Postby Adam Balm on Sun Jul 22, 2007 12:39 am

I was expecting like the twisters to sweep through the power plant, destroying it, then spreading nuclear fallout everywhere with their ATOMIC TWISTING!!!!!!11

What we got was some twisters that knocked the power out of a nuclear plant, which could've been bad if it led to anything. No melt-down, just let-down.
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Postby stereosforgeeks on Sun Jul 22, 2007 12:52 am

Adam Balm wrote:I was expecting like the twisters to sweep through the power plant, destroying it, then spreading nuclear fallout everywhere with their ATOMIC TWISTING!!!!!!11

What we got was some twisters that knocked the power out of a nuclear plant, which could've been bad if it led to anything. No melt-down, just let-down.


It wouldnt lead to anything. You blow out the largest hole in the reactor that you can and it will just shut the f down.
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Postby instant_karma on Sun Jul 22, 2007 3:41 am

So, I finished Atomic Twister.

Dull
Dull
Dull

Like Adam, I was expecting full on radioactive twister carnage. Instead we get 'whew, that was close'.

It seemed more like it should be on the Hallmark channel than Sci-Fi.
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SCIFI Channel "original" movies (ATOMIC TWISTER!)

Postby bastard_robo on Sun Jul 22, 2007 4:32 am

More like that discovery channel "MEGA DISASTERS" episode!
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Postby SilentBobX on Sun Jul 22, 2007 6:53 am

SuperGator vs. DinoCroc

I want it, you want, we all want it.

Personally, I hate to think that the scifi channel is the only place to find new giant monster movies, which have been on the wane of these past few years. At least in quality.

I know now that they're starting to make a comeback and I hope that's a sign of things to come. I feel that after Jurassic Park, alot of people were hoping for giant monster on the loose movies to make a comeback, but sadly, they never acheived the thrill of Harryhausen's monsters like Ymir, or The Beast From 20,000 Fathoms. And they descended into obscurity after Godzilla 98, which is sad.

Side note: 20 Million Miles To Earth is getting a 50th anniversary 2 disc SE coming soon(check amazon).

To me, giant monsters remain perhaps my favorite genre of horror film. Yes, the thrill of a serial killer coming back for 153 sequels is cool and all..........but it loses its luster after the first 41 times. Let's hope this genre rebounds and gives us the thrills we all deserve at the box office, not just on the scifi channel.

Mahalo
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Postby Adam Balm on Sun Jul 22, 2007 2:27 pm

Another thing you gotta love in Atomic Twister is how fucking heroic Mark-Paul Gosselaar is. It's not enough that he's this tough-as-nails sheriff, but when one of the needed diesel trucks tries to flee the scene he runs the guy down, pulls him out of his truck, and drives the truck back to the nuclear plant himself. THEN we see him donning a fire-fighter's get up and joining the fire-men trying to cool the reactor. Seriously, all that was missing was for him to die on a cross at the end.
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Postby instant_karma on Sun Jul 22, 2007 3:31 pm

Adam Balm wrote:Another thing you gotta love in Atomic Twister is how fucking heroic Mark-Paul Gosselaar is. It's not enough that he's this tough-as-nails sheriff, but when one of the needed diesel trucks tries to flee the scene he runs the guy down, pulls him out of his truck, and drives the truck back to the nuclear plant himself. THEN we see him donning a fire-fighter's get up and joining the fire-men trying to cool the reactor. Seriously, all that was missing was for him to die on a cross at the end.


I liked the set up line early on in the sheriffs dept. "I gave up trucks for this?"

I just assumed this was a subtle bit of character writing and was in no way goint to lead to a scene of him driving a truck at some point later.

I have to admit, there were a couple of scenes that did make me laugh. The kid asking his babysitter to play twister (in a twister movie!) so he could check her out.

I also enjoyed the firemen passing out from the heat and then knocking each other over with their hoses. Some slapstick in the climactic stages of a nuclear disaster movie is always welcome.

I sometimes wish that these movies used comtemporary effects, but with 1950's B-movie style approach to science.

"Do you know what will happen if that tornado breaches the reactor?"

"My God. It'll spread radiation over the entire state, turning Ohio into a nightmare wasteland of mutant cannibals and giant psychic ants!"

"Yes. Blast those Godless commies and their tornado machine!"
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Postby Adam Balm on Sun Jul 22, 2007 4:32 pm

instant_karma wrote:I sometimes wish that these movies used comtemporary effects, but with 1950's B-movie style approach to science.

"Do you know what will happen if that tornado breaches the reactor?"

"My God. It'll spread radiation over the entire state, turning Ohio into a nightmare wasteland of mutant cannibals and giant psychic ants!"

"Yes. Blast those Godless commies and their tornado machine!"


Did you watch Raptor Island that was on earlier? It was almost that bad. I just caught the tail end of it and apparently some nuclear WMD that a terrorist was trying to acquire created an island full of velociraptors.
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Postby Chilli on Sun Jul 22, 2007 4:37 pm

Adam Balm wrote:
instant_karma wrote:I sometimes wish that these movies used comtemporary effects, but with 1950's B-movie style approach to science.

"Do you know what will happen if that tornado breaches the reactor?"

"My God. It'll spread radiation over the entire state, turning Ohio into a nightmare wasteland of mutant cannibals and giant psychic ants!"

"Yes. Blast those Godless commies and their tornado machine!"


Did you watch Raptor Island that was on earlier? It was almost that bad. I just caught the tail end of it and apparently some nuclear WMD that a terrorist was trying to acquire created an island full of velociraptors.


Crap - there goes my dream of a Con Air/Jurrasic Park crossover.
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Postby instant_karma on Sun Jul 22, 2007 6:07 pm

Adam Balm wrote:
instant_karma wrote:I sometimes wish that these movies used comtemporary effects, but with 1950's B-movie style approach to science.

"Do you know what will happen if that tornado breaches the reactor?"

"My God. It'll spread radiation over the entire state, turning Ohio into a nightmare wasteland of mutant cannibals and giant psychic ants!"

"Yes. Blast those Godless commies and their tornado machine!"


Did you watch Raptor Island that was on earlier? It was almost that bad. I just caught the tail end of it and apparently some nuclear WMD that a terrorist was trying to acquire created an island full of velociraptors.


Sadly, I did not see that. It sounds just about perfect.

Although I do get the Sci-fi channel here on my cable package in the UK, it has a different schedule from the US channel. So, in order to watch these movies at the same time as you guys, I have to use methods of questionable legality.

That's right. I broke international copyright laws to watch Atomic Twister.

And I may do so again to watch Raptor Island.

It's almost like the crime and the punishment are the same thing...
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Postby instant_karma on Thu Jul 26, 2007 10:15 pm

So, I watched Raptor Island.

Part of my enjoyment of these movies are the "Uh, okay..." moments, and Raptor Island had quite a few of them. Sometimes these come from really bad writing, but a lot of the time it comes from the generally cheap production values. In this case, it mostly came down to a combination of bad direction and low budget. For instance -

We see the titular island (located somewhere in the South China Sea) in a obviously CGI establishing shot. It's clearly meant to be a tropical island with a giant volcano and dense rainforrest. However, when the characters set foot on said island, they are clearly wandering around in a decidedly non-tropical forrest somewhere in Bulgaria, which currently seems to be the world capital of low budget monster movie production.

The shots of the speedboat and dingy arriving at the island are also great. Although Bulgaria does has some coastline on the Black Sea, the boats were clearly shot on a lake, so they were constantly framed so tightly because if the shot was any wider, we'd be able to see the other opposite shore of the lake.

With the exception of the speedboat and dingy, every vehicle (a plane, a helicopter, a couple of freighters and a US Navy Gunship) in the movie is a dodgy looking CGI model that looks like something out of a mid 90s computer game cut scene.

The bridge set for the US Navy gunship is probably less convincing than the that for the bridge of the original Star Trek. Rows of 'computer screens' along the walls that are nothing more than coloured strips of plastic with lights behind them. Oh, and when the radar operator consults his monitor, it rather usefully has the words 'main radar' displayed accross the middle of the screen. I guess US Naval personnel forget details like which is the main radar, so reminders like that are handy. Then again, maybe every other radar display I've seen in a big budget movie was a lie and this is how the actually look in the real world.

Another sign that the budget for this was so tight, was that the producers couldn't affort to hire American actors for all the speaking parts. There are a couple of (presumably Bulgarian) actors who are either in the process of still learning English, or just memorized their lines phonetically. Still, you have to give them credit for not just overdubbing them.

The CGI for the raptors and the T-Rex isn't terribly bad, although it is still several notches short of Jurassic Park. The quality of composites between CGI and background vary wildly from shot to shot, and sometimes the annimators forgot to bulletwound and blood effects to the raptors when they were being shot, while other times they remembered.

Pretty much all of the gunplay in this movie is done really badly. Things to look out for if you're lucky enough to catch this are the highly trained Navy SEAL guys spraying their machine guns wildly from side to side when they are supposedly shooting at a single stationary target. Then there's the guy shooting at baby raptors that are maybe the size of a chicken, no more than a couple of feet away from him. It takes this highly trained soldier maybe a dozen shots before he hits one the things.

My absolute favourite "Uh, okay...' moment is when, having established that the raptors are so bloodthirsty, they'll attack one of their own if it's injured, the humans decide to concentrate all their fire on a single raptor (they can withstand a whole lot of machine gun fire you see). The purpose of this excercise is to injure one of the 4 raptors chasing them, so the rest will turn on it and allow them to make good their escape. So, having got their chosen raptor injured and down on the ground, they run away, right? Nope, they continue to stand there and pour round after round of ammunition into it, while the other raptors politely stand there and patiently wait for them to finish.

According to imdb, there's a Raptor Island 2 currently in production. The plot summary given, with random use of French, is as follows-

Year 2066: The raptors are not extinct and they proliferated in the quatres corners of the galaxy, leaving a very little place for humans. The only hope for the human race is a group of soldiers.


Intriguingly, the evil terrorist that gets eaten by a T-Rex at the end of Raptor Island is listed in the cast for this sequel that takes place after his apparent death. 60 odd years later. In space.

So, it seems I have a reason to live for a few more months at least...
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Postby Cha-Ka Khan on Fri Jul 27, 2007 11:27 am

What an awesome review! It actually makes me feel lucky if I get a chance to see this!
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Postby darkjedijaina on Sat Jul 28, 2007 1:00 pm

ohhh man, i just finished watching FRANKENFISH. that was pretty awesomely lame.
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Postby minstrel on Sat Jul 28, 2007 3:09 pm

This thread begs the question: Why do intelligent people who know better WATCH this crap? The titles are enough to tell you they're crap: "Frankenfish", "Dinocroc". Jeez.

So, given that intelligent people watch these movies KNOWING they're crap, there must be something in the makeup of the intelligent human psyche that craves crap.

Is it that there's pleasure in watching crap just so you can post about it here saying "What a stupid piece of crap that was!"?

Is it that we're so starved for sci-fi that we'll even take crap sci-fi rather than re-watch something good?

Is it that, deep down inside, we actually LIKE crap? Not for its humor value, but its crap "value"?

Intelligent, educated, mature people with excellent taste actually make time in their lives for crap. Why?
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Postby darkjedijaina on Sat Jul 28, 2007 3:15 pm

See, I don't watch these movies because I think they're good. I watch them because I like how bad they are. I watch them so that I can laugh. I don't honestly think that the movies are made to be 'good'... y'know? They're made to poke fun at, made for those that love the cheese factor.

As far as why we like the cheese factor, I think it's because life gets too serious at times. Perhaps these movies are made to make us see that things really aren't that bad, perhaps they are a form of comic relief.
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Postby DennisMM on Sat Jul 28, 2007 3:17 pm

I have to agree with jaina about the people who make these movies. There's no way they can be taking themselves seriously at this point. Ed Wood couldn't be serious while making these movies. I suspect the crew and actors go out to have fun with the knowledge that most everyone is aware the production is for laughs. All involved make a little money in the process. SciFi viewers get some stupid fun, possibly with a bit of smoke or alcohol. It's appointment silliness in the post-MST3K era.
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Postby instant_karma on Sat Jul 28, 2007 5:56 pm

All I'm saying minstrel is that I bet I'll be better prepared than you when the raptors/gargoyles/atomic twisters/giant snakes/megalodons/frankenfish/mammoths/yetis/psych ic ants/nazi zombies attack.

Then you'll be like "Oh, instant_karma, they have killed my neighbours, laid waste to local public amenities and eaten all my cheese. What should I do? Help me!"

And I'll be like "Sucks to be you dude. Maybe you should've been watching the sci-fi channel and getting yourself a proper education. I bet they didn't cover any of this shit in Solaris. Now quit buggin me, I've got a post-apocolyptic wasteland to become king of!"

Then I'll jump onto the gryphon that I've tamed by using the power of my awesomeness, and take to the skies...
Last edited by instant_karma on Sun Jul 29, 2007 11:03 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby minstrel on Sat Jul 28, 2007 5:58 pm

@instant_karma:

:lol:
"Everybody is equally shitty and wrong." - Ribbons
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